Tuesday, March 31, 2009
All in all, I had a very wonderful time and I am back to my hood feeling refreshed and re-energized.
You see, I needed a trip like this. For the longest time I have been feeling very blahhh and mehhh as I mentioned in my last random post that had Geebee feeling like he was floating in space. :-)
Infact, on thursday (day before my trip), I was feeling sooo mehhh that I honestly toyed with the idea of cancelling my trip. Twas a fleeting thought but STILL. Who toys with the idea of cancelling a trip to Las Vegas?
I am glad I went. I got a chance to re-connect with old friends, I had soooo much fun, infact this had to be one of my most fun trips and trust me I engage in a lot of trips that involve fun and I got to listen to some much needed pep talks. Thanks to the pep talks, on my long long flight back home (with 1 million stops) I wrote an entry in my journal and identified some of those areas in my life leading to the mehness/blahness that I been feeling and my plan is to tackle 'em head on.
I will keep you guys posted!
On to the main the main. A couple of people tagged me in this honesty scrap meme. (What is the scrap for anyways?). Now I don ready for am.
I won't bother with the rules and I tag anyone who feels moved by the spirit to do one of these. Here goes...
1. I can't hold a grudge to save my life. I find it very easy to forgive people...(Must explain the reason why I'm still so cool with all my shitty exes). If you piss me off, I state my beef right there and then and I keep it moving. It sure makes life much easier o jare.
2. I honestly think that I'm a very simple person. My personality is far from complex, I don't internalize (see #1), I say whatever it is as the spirit moves me, I don't have any ridiculous skeletons in my closet. I'm just simple, uncomplicated and drama free. Note:- I conducted a survey among my friends to verify this and the general consensus was that I am correct! Hehehehehe
3. When I was younger I wanted to be the main chick in someone's video. Now, I really want to act in a Nollywood movie. I think that I have what it takes, sans the crying bit. I mean y'all, is it just me or do those actresses know how to cry on demand?
4. Speaking of crying, I find it very hard to cry. Loved ones have passed away and I never shed one tear. Exes don did me dirty and I never shed a tear. I mean, I really can't remember the last time I cried. Do I have a problem?
5. Everyone keeps calling me a popular jingo/party girl. Okay maybe I am, but believe it or not I can be very shy and socially awkward when it comes to interacting with men that I am attracted to. As opposed to being the usual outgoing person that I can be, I tend to withdraw from the dude in question and then I get really self conscious and in my mind, I start acting all weird. Help!!! :-(
6. I enjoy Solitude/me-time! Yeah yeah, no one believes this thanks to the Popular jingo/party girl reputation but I really do. Growing up, when I went home for summer holidays I always looked forward to weekdays when my parents would go to work, and my sibs would go out and leave just me at home. If you leave me, I can spend an entire week at home doing nothing but watching tv, listening to music, journalling, thinking...anything that involves me, me and me.
7. I'm a journaholic/writeaholic. I've been keeping journals since I was 10. So far I have about 11-12 books which i go back to read randomly and I either cheese or cringe at the things that i wrote/my state of mind at that point. I'm still extra paranoid about people stumbling across my journals and reading them, those are my private thoughts o jare.
8. I've been accused of being a 'surface' individual. Surface being that I never really talk about what I'm feeling/what's going on with me. One of my friends said that I never talk about myself, another said that she usually has to drag out gist from me. I don't think it's intentional...I'm just so used to listening to people talk about themselves that I forget to share mine. I am working on this sha, like I have to make a conscious effort to say 'Hey my hot and sexy co-worker tried to holla at me' or 'I'm so hurt by X's actions', where I normally would write this in my journal/tuck it away in my head.
9. I get very easily irritated. I claim that I don't have a temper problem and I don't think that I do, it's just that sometimes my irritation might lead to me going off on someone. I do get over my bouts pretty quickly sha. Like I'm irritated now and check back in 5 mins, I'll probably be good.
Someone called me volatile sha...
10. I look at people and instantly decide that I don't like them or that they look annoying. Really bad habit but I can't help it. I will say that I started out like this with one of my oldest friends and I love her to death today. There is hope....LOL.
11. I don't curse outwardly. I think I'd sound awkward cursing but best believe that a lot of cursing goes on in my head. It's terrible. Oh and don't try me on the road...everyone on the road is a 'dumb bitch' or a 'stupid ass motherfucker' or something of that nature. My road rage elevates my cursing in ze head.
12. Back to the PJ/Party girl thing. Everyone instantly thinks that I'm supposed to be friendly, and for the longest time I really did think I was friendly till some people pointed out that I'm not as friendly as I like to think I am. I insist that it depends on when you meet me/what mood I'm in, I really can't say. I'm not unfriendly jare, I just need to warm up to people first.
13. Last but not least, I can display different facets of my personality to different people. My coworkers swear that I'm really quiet. (Yeah right!), I used to live with roommates who thought I was extra reserved/really sweet and one day someone was talking bout how I went off on someone else and they were so surprised. I am sweet o! No mind my naysayers...lol. I guess if you spend more time with me/get to know me well you will see the real and true Mgbeks.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
In my head and around me, Nice anon & Olu. Y'all don't have blogs? Abi ya profile be private and steez?
So much for anonymity (sp? Too lazy to check)...seems like a bunch of folk have stumbled across this piece right here, put two and two together and figured t'is yours truly. Ah well, I guess there will be no crazy stories of the sexploits. Psssh, see amebos getting all excited, like I go tell una sef. :-p
What I would really really love to do is take a month's staycation i.e stay home, sleep, eat, watch Naija movies and just RELAX.
I still need that personal masseuse on call 24/7.
I can't muster up the energy to do much these days. Rolling out of bed in the mornings is a task, I friggin' wanna call in sick everyday. (See what I said about missing college?). Work is just blehhh. Things in general seem bleh-ish. I live for fridays! Is this what life is about?
On a brighter note, I read Shona's post about reading and took my lil butt to the library. I came away with about 10 books. Sooo exciting.
I love to read. I think I did more reading when I was younger though. I read my first Stephen King book when I was 10, I read the entire kiddie encyclopedia back to back, I read Shakespeares plays. I read a lot, and I think all that reading made me a smart lil kid with quite the vocabulary. These days ermm...
I feel like I've gotten older and all the things I was more passionate about back then have faded with age. I don't wanna turn into this dull old woman dammit!
To go to the gym, or not. See? I even used to be passionate about the gym. My friend even had the nerve to call me a 'gym rat'. AS IF! Now, I just wanna go home lie in bed and watch something or read my newly acquired library books.
There is a cutie at the gym tho, who could be a motivation. I swear he has to be like 40 or something but ooooh weeee, he's fine. And he lifts everyday (cos I bes in there like everyday), such nice, strong arms...*dreamily stares into space*
*Earth to Mgbeks*
I recently took a drive through my old hood, and thought to myself 'Mgbeks, you don came a long way oooo'. God is good.
I should be working, but I'm blogging. *smh*
Well, just consider this to be a lil break of some sorts. Pssshhhh...
I've decided to go to the gym. And no, it's not because I want to peep my old hottie. :-D
Don't you just love it when you spray perfume in the morning and all day you can smell it on you in the most subtle places. Hmmmm, yummy.
I think I'm a scentaholic. My room is littered with scented candles in random corners, I refuse to buy the more economic $7 Jergens lotion at CVS and instead spend twice that amount on some overrated Bath & Body works lotion that won't even last me for that long. I just love to smell nice, it makes me wanna have me for dinner.
All of a sudden it's cool to be a 'Recessionista', no thanks to the economy. Folk are proudly twittering about buying designer boots for $20. I stay seeing all these CNN articles talking 'bout 'we now shop at thrift stores and we buy vintage'. Abeg, make these JJC's no come finish my baffs o. Shuoooo...stick to your Neiman Marcus abeg.
Ok, gotta get back to work.
All thoughts squeezed fresh and unadulterated from ze brain.
PS:- Updating 2x in a week? Hmm hmmm that's how it starts.
Monday, March 23, 2009
To be honest, I've been kinda clueless about this whole awards kini and so I wasn't paying too much attention to the going-ons. A fabulous chica was nice enough to draw my attention to the marra...(Shoutouts to Zi) and I just wanna say THANK YOU to whoever nominated me and whoever plans to vote/voted for me. *Takes a bow*
Now, make we enter the koko. Make we yarn the matter. I've been having all kinds of thoughts of the dynamics between men and women, relationships and the whole 9 yards and I figured, I'd share...
Blurt #1: Men have gotten LAZY...
Men have gotten lazy. They go to parties and post up against the wall...if you wanted to stand around and watch people dance, you should have stayed up and watched America's Best Dance Crew or something. When the ladies call them out on it, they say 'Do you know how hard it is for a man to step to a female and ask for her number? What if she rejects me?'
That my friends is nothing but pure laziness. I always think back to the days of our parents and although everyone is quick to remind me that this isn't the days of our parents, I still insist that these men need to learn from their fathers. In our parents days, our fathers were persistent. They chased after our mothers, and even went knocking on their father's doors in no time saying 'there is a flower in your garden that we would like to pluck'. :-D
Our mothers had plenty suitors because back in the day it seemed that men were willing to put in the work to bag the ladies. I mean, if y'all think I'm trippin' go back and ask your mothers how your fathers toasted them and come back and report to me.
In 2009, it is now a huge deal for a man to approach a woman and ask for her digits. They cook up all kinds of excuses, they feel they have too many options and in general they can't be bothered. So that leaves the ladies to do the 'work'. The ladies now have to trade places Usher style and approach the guys.
Well, let me tell you guys. In this same 2009, I still REFUSE to approach a man and ask for his number. Whaaat? Why should I? Before you know it now, women will have to start popping the question to men. *Rolls eyes*
Trust me, I'm as 'untraditional' as they come but when it comes to being approached, you can pretty much call me an ol' school village girl.
I believe when a man sees what he wants, he should go for it and he should go hard. So therefore, let ol' boy be the one to come at me and come hard. Don't get me wrong o, I'm not going to 'form' and give him a hard time because I am trying to test his love or whatever. Never that!
But at the same time, he should be the one to approach me and come at me in a seriously correct manner.
I know that some of my ladies are with me on this, and on the other hand some other ladies dey give me side eye thinking this 'babe dey jonz, be there waiting to be approached...all your mates go marry before you, e go do you like film show'. To each her own abi? I mean I'm not knocking ladies who approach guys o jare, na your way and it's admirably very bold but I no fit abeg.
Blurt #2: I hope I never turn into those girls...
Those girls! You know who they are, they go to events with their SO's and clutch 'em tightly/drape themselves across the SO in order to let the other ladies know that he's TAKEN. They perch daintily on their seats and smirk at you and your girls doing the dutty whine on the dance floor probably thinking things like: 'See these attention seekers, sorry he's taken' OR 'Awww, it must suck to be single and have to dance extra hard to get noticed around these parts'. I mean come on, you JUST know that's what they are thinking.
SO never leaves their sight...
Kini big deal? I've always thought of myself as pretty liberal and accomodating when it comes to an SO. Go off and do your thing with your peoples, and I'll do mine. I'm secure enough to know that you are MINE so I don't need to clutch you too tightly in my effort at sending messages across. I'm just saying...
Blurt #3: Ladies, when are we going to stop giving excuses for men?
I've heard of couples where the man moved across nations, seas and countries to be with his lady. That right there= True love and dedication.
So why are we trying to excuse the fact that his azz hasn't called in 5 days? Talking bout 'It's tax season and he's busy'.
Infact let me paraphrase what one very wise man once said: 'How busy can a man be? I bet he's not too busy to take a shit so while he's taking his 5 minute shit, he can call you'
He also added 'Even Barack Obama who was so busy campaigning all over the world found time to call Michelle, so no man can be THAT busy'.
If he's really into you, he will call and maybe the fact that he uses the excuse 'I'm not a phone person' as his reason for not might just be the hard pill to swallow:- He's just not that into me and there's no excuses for that one.
Blurt #4: It's recession out there for single gals.
Our mothers are saying stuff like 'Go out more often', 'Make yourself more available' etc etc. We are exasperated with this talk. Where else we wan go?... Fashion shows? check. Charity balls? check. Parties? check. Weddings? check. Truth of the marra is you might be the popular jingo in your city but it is getting harder to meet single, correct men. I once went to a wedding and the entire grooms train was boo'ed up, talkless of the actual guests. Na so so couples, couples everywhere.
Beautiful, accomplished women are wondering 'where is he and when will I meet him?'. My sisters, I can't say that I have any idea. You see, I quit wondering and asking that question when I realized what the 'market' was looking like. I did my post on the scarcity of males in the DMV and ladies from other hoods also complained about the scarcity of males in their cities.
The males aint forthcoming, the situation is looking bleak and like my friend said (she will soon come and accuse me of plagiarism..I dey paraphrase am o!)...'Whoever God has for me, he should personally deliver him to my doorstep in a Fedex box because I'm done sweating the situation'. Church!!! I say preach it, my sister.
Na real Fedex box e go be 'cos ummm yeah I step out of my zone with ZERO expectations i.e hoping to meet whoever. And in regards to putting yourself out there? I've started favoring spending my free time catching up on sleep/watching Naija movies so e go be real Fedex box 'cos the social situations aren't as appealing as they used to be o jare. Sorry Mama...
Hopefully the Fedex delivery guy is cute so that I can do eeenie meenie mani mo. :-D
Blurt #5: The single life isn't a bad life at all...
Piggy backing off the last blurt. We are getting older, we are moaning the lack of SO's. But let's think outside of the box. I can't say that I'm not liking my single life. Sure, I might have my moments of 'I'm singleeeeeee...waaaaaaa' now and then but in general, I have no complaints.
A couple of people said to me recently: 'You seem to be a real party girl, all the tagged pictures of you are at some party or the event' and I laughed and said 'Yes o, let me get my party on before someone marries me and frowns at me everytime I want to go out'. Hehehehe...no be so tho?
You get married and your 'me, me, me' mentality and lifestyle flies out of the window. You just can't up and head to Vegas with the girls. You can't shamelessly flirt with the boys.
I say enjoy your 'now' 'cos I really think that at some time if and when we get married, some of us will look at the young girls doing the dutty whine on the dance floor and feel a bit of nostalgia. C'mon it's like when we were in college and so desperately wanted to graduate and everyone said 'Trust me, you will miss your college days'...I scoffed at that like yeah right! Me miss college ke?
Let's just say that I am eating my words. Sometimes I do miss being a carefree college kid with no worries in the world. If I wanted to skip class 5 days a week, I could. I had spring break and summer vacays, I could party on thursday nights and somehow make it into class on friday mornings. I think that's how marriage might be, you may love it but you'll think back on the single days and miss the freedom that came with it. So while you're single and unencumbered, let's have a blast shall we? :-)
Blurt #6:- Be YOU!
I swear I am so sick and tired of reading 'rules' for what these men are supposedly looking for in a wifey. I've come to realize that you might be the high maintenance chick who doesn't cook for shi shi but if a man decide say na you hin want, na you hin go pick. Girls are losing their identities in this quest to be considered 'wifey material'. Maka why? In the end, he'll probably dump you and go with the girl who parties till 3am every weekend, the extra high maintenance chick who doesn't cook, basically the girl who is everything you tried not to be just to make him happy.
Ughhhh 'wifey material'. I think I officially hate that term. What the fudge is a wifey material? Psssst...these men will talk talk talk but in the end, dem go walk down the aisle with the exact opposite of their so-called wifey material chick.
Leave tori for tortoise, all that one na tales by moonlight. You just do you and if he likes your ring tone, I bet he won't give a hoot!
Blurt #7:- I've quit trying to figure men out.
I was reading the blog: Singeblackmale.net and some of the male perspectives were really like ????
Ladies complained about giving men their digits and the man never called and some of the men came in to say that sometimes they ask for the digits just to check and see if they still got 'it'. Huh? Are we in grade school??? That is the most juvenile chit ever.
Some people say that I constantly come off as being irritated with men, some have even called me a male basher and I insist that I am not. I just won't sit back and let the foolishness continue. Agbaya's are in the club trying to see if they still got 'it'? *SMH*
Infact, make I no talk again sef before blogger accuses me too.
Blurt #8:- Is being a 'good girl' overrated?
Have you noticed how the ones known as the professional headmistresses, head doctors and what not are getting boo'ed up/ringed up? Zena, remember how you spoke about how you be randomly hearing some chicks gist? Well...ditto. It's unfortunate.
Next thing you know, they are engaged or something and it's like wow! Whatever happened to men looking for the good, chaste, church going gals?
I mean, I realize that in this day and age men want a girl who knows her way around the bedroom but is knowing your way around the whole city's bedroom now the 'in-thing'. Goody 2 shoe ladies, do not lose hope. God dey!
Blurt #9:-It seems that the bratty high maintenance chicks are winning!
How many times have you seen some ridiculously bratty 'I called you 10 times, where the hell were you' kind of extra possessive chick with some really sweet guy and you're like na wa o!
I mean guys, I realize that some of you like to feel needed but na so e do you reach? I guess when one blows up your phone 10x back to back and bitches about you spending too much time with the boys, it means that she really loves you and doesn't want to spend too much time away from you. *shrugs*
I have no blurt #10. The blurt well dried up.
Till the next round of blurts...
Peace & Love
Monday, March 16, 2009
1. They claim to not hang out with other Nigerians: You're new in town and you want to know where the Naija hangout spots be, so you ask the nearest Nigerian and they say 'I have no idea. I don't hang out with Nigerians in this city, they talk too much' blahblahblah.
I mean I can respect that but Nigerians, y'all gotta know that there are better ways to make your point i.e 'I really have no idea, I haven't really checked out the Naija social scene...'
Plus some people really be feeling themselves thinking that folk are talking about them. Here's what I always say: People will talk about you if you give them a reason to and no, comments from your 'haters' about your shoes or the forever21 dress you rocked to the party does not count as folk talking about you. I'm just saying...
Plus for the people who lived in Nigeria, what did you do then? Hide under a rock???
2. They claim to have an eclectic taste in music yet will be the first ones to say chit like 'I don't listen to rap/hiphop: Get the fork out of here with that foolishness and while you're at it, open your dictionary and look up the meaning of the word 'eclectic'. Listening to alternative/rock/pop/white folk music doesn't automatically mean that your taste is eclectic.
I mean why do some Nigerians be feeling extra cool with that kini though? It's like all of a sudden black folk music doesn't get you in the cool kids club. I've had a couple of people comment on my taste in music as being too 'urban' and I was really like WTF? I bet my last dollar that you won't run into a white person who came upon her friend listening to some Daughtry and say 'OMG Becky, your taste in music is soo white'.
3. Their damn jobs and career defines their very existence: I mean really, what is it with Nigerians and the pissing contest? I can't tell you how many events I've been to and I met a new individual and I can bet another dollar that within the first 5 minutes they wanna know what you do and where you work? Like damn homes, how that one take affect the price of fish in the market na?
Oh no, the convo could go like this:
Stranger: So what do you do?
Mgbeke: I'm a consultant
Stranger: Oh, so do you work for Booz, McKinsey, Deloitte, Accenture etc etc
Like what the fudge? What if I'm a friggin' consultant for McDonalds, ya know consulting with them on how tasty the fries are.
Mgbeke: No, actually I do consulting for a small non-profit organization.
Stranger: *Disinterested voice* Oh...
I know y'all feel me on this one.
4. They take this whole being 'different' thing to a whole new level: I mean, just check it. You go to the parties and see the men in all their foolishness wearing tight ass velvet blazers and sateen shirts. They trying to be different and failing miserably. Just wear your jeans and t-shirt and come have some fun.
Guys, you're toasting a chick and before you fit say 'Jack Robinson' she don told you of how she is atheist, vegetarian and not your average Nigerian chick. You know you feel me on this.
Kini big deal? If you really are 'different', you don't need to announce it. Your light will shine through.
5. They tell you to pray about everything/include religion in everything: 'I am so scared my husband is cheating on me'- Awww my sister, pray about it. God is in control.
'I think I bombed my MCATS'- Pele o. Pray about it.
Duhhhhhhhh. Don't tell me something I might not already know, but there's a reason I'm whining to you and it's not because I want you to tell me to pray about it.
And what is really hood with including religion in everything? A friend of mine once updated her FB status wondering about love and how it's complicated or something of that nature. I kid you not when I tell you that her status turned into this realllyyyyyy long thread where some chicks came in and told her to seek the love of God first before wondering about erotic love or whatever. *Blank stare*
6. Chicks be feeling extra cool about where they shop: Razz chicks indeed. When I first hit Yankee, e be laik say Express was the zone to shop. You'd hear chicks proudly boasting 'I only shop at Express', now e be like say e don turn into Bebe. Now na so so 'I only shop at Bebe, Arden B etc etc' and I just shake my head like see this bushinta. You dey carry Express and Bebe pose for the girl who is carrying her unmonogrammed Louis Vuitton bag and silently laughing at you.
7. They look down on your school and your major: Okoros and Mgbekes feeling funky because they went to Spelman/Morehouse and you went to Clark Atlanta. You proudly brag about your 4.0 GPA standing and they ask you what your major is, you say 'Early Childhood education' and they turn their noses up and tell you that when you can maintain a 4.0 in Electrical Engineering, come and open mouth.
*Ok I'm cracking up as I'm typing this one sha. LOL @ Early Childhood education, with our Naija parents ke...dem go say lai lai I aint finna spend thousands of dollars on tuition only for you study some cat damn early childhood education. LMAO. Make I no digress sha...
8. They remix their names: Rotimi= Tim. Peju= Paige. Seun- Shawn. 'Nuff said.
9. Individuals who never even siddon Yankee for 3 months don suddenly acquire Americana accent. Can I just say that it's even worse with the Jand folk? Nna ehn, you no fit talk anything to Jand folk o. I can't think of anyone I know in that Jand area wey no get Jandon accent, just dey yarn like say hot yam dey their throat. Peeps wey never settle on top Jand for even 2 weeks go dey talk 'Is it', 'Yeah', 'I fancy you'. LMAO...Infact ehn, Jand folk imma do a blog entry dedicated to y'all 'cos y'all amuse the heck out of me. Abeg no take am personal o. :D
But yah, wazzup with the sudden acquisition of an accent tho? At least Jand folk fit do am...I hear say everybody for Lagos get british accent including those wey never even cross River Naija talkess of coughing within 5 miles of an airport but you know say you no fit pull off Yankee accent any and any how. Na in peeps go dey mix Yankee accents with their Igbotic/Yorubatic accents and ultimately end up sounding like a bunch of clowns!
10. They turn their noses up at Pidgin english and act like it's razz to speak it: I go take this one personally o! In case you haven't noticed, I tend to mix pidjin english into my posts. As a Port Harcourt born and bred babe, I suppose dey blow am well well na. I'm not that fluent in my native language but I am pretty fluent in pidgin so I still claim to be bi-lingual. :-p
I have some friends with whom I pretty much interact with in mainly pidgin, so yes you might overhear us kiki-ing it up and turn your noses up and just for that, you have sinned. Ha!
Here's my take: There's a time and place for everything including speaking your language. I don't talk about you nacking Igbo in the middle of Walmart so abeg allow me yarn my yarn in peace and not pieces o jare.
....It's past my bedtime but I know there is more. Feel free to tell me yours.
Disclaimer #1: Not applicable to all Nigerians of course.
Disclaimer #2: Not neccesarily applicable to strictly Nigerians sef, but hey I had to look for a scape goat. :-)
Monday, March 9, 2009
My IM lists in total has about 5-7 active people. I deleted the 1 million other inactive folk who I randomly chatted with one and off.
I am constantly downsizing stuff from my closet...
Yes, I dislike clutter.
And it gets extra awkward when such idle inviduals randomly text you out of the blue with 'What's up blahblahblah' and I'm thinking 'who is this?'. Back in the day I tried to be nice about it and cook up some excuse about 'I switched phones and your number didn't make it'.
These days I straight up ask 'who is this?' and I get responses like 'ah ah, is that how it is?'
Nothing personal sis/bro...I just do not like clutter.
I noticed that I had been deleted off about 2 individuals' Facebook friends lists and I wasn't even mad at that. If I was in their shoes and I was some inactive random person on their list, I would probably delete me too.
Sometimes I wonder if I should make space for a little clutter.
For instance, in the case of the deleted numbers. I figure that it's not a bad thing to hold on to people's numbers just in case of incasity, but then I figure that is what facebook is for right? right.
I mean, I'm more lenient with the FB thing. So if there was any in case of incasity event that came up, I could always contact you on Facebook and possibly ask for your # or something.
It is just a huge peeve to be scrolling through my phonebook looking for a number and I find a whole bunch of random ass digits that are making it even harder to find what I am looking for.
Or ya know, I don't understand why I should have a whole bunch of folk on my IM list that I don't even talk to like that.
And I don't think that it's a bad idea to de-clutter one's blog list too. I mean are you really going to be reading and commenting on someone's blog and they never/hardly ever check on you? Or is that petty?
Either way, de-cluttering rocks!
So, do you keep the stagnant folk around in case of incasity or are you a constant 'downsizer' like me?
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
We continued to chat...but it got me thinking about said X dude and other types of yummy yums that I've come across in my lifetime. I run into these extra hot dudes and wonder what kind of women they date 'cos somewhere in my mind, I am convinced that I am not these men's 'type' in terms of the physical.
Oya hold your horses. I know what you might be thinking...Insecure? Never that.
I'm actually pretty confident when it comes to the opposite sex. Like a typical LEO, I expect to step up in a piece and get noticed 'cos I gots good swag, I'm a cute chick etc etc
But does getting noticed= hot men considering me to be their type? Sure, they could peep me and think 'Oh, she's cute' or 'Yeah she got that swag' but not neccesarily consider me to be what they'd usually go for.
Yes, I'm convinced that most men have a physical 'type'. I shared these thoughts with the BT and she said something along the lines of 'men have a universal type of chick that they will see and start drooling over' and I knew that my thought process wasn't too crazy.
To further prove my point, I swear we go out to the clubs/parties and the women with the tight 'fits displaying some or all of their assets (preferably a cute ass or some nice perky tiddies) complete with long cascading curls and heels high enough to put the eiffel tower to shame are the ones who stand out.
Are these a universal type?
To wrap up that gist topic, BT said 'I consider myself to be a personal taste'.
You ask me, 'Personal taste ke?, what is that?'
And I respond:- Being a personal taste means that I might not be the universally accepted standard of what is hot/cute/sexy but I'm still a fly chick who holds her own.
Unfortunately it seems that when it comes to first impressions, personal taste aint gon' cut it 'cos despite what these dudes say, looks are a major factor when it comes to us wimmens and being considered a 'universal type' seems to be what will get you noticed from the get. Meanwoos as per personal taste, you just might have to have a convo or 2 with me before you realize that you like my ringtone. :-D
Ya get my drift sha...
Some random observations from my end:
1. I'm not anti the cascading curls that could put Beyonce to shame. I just wear my hair cut low 90% of the time 'cos it's easier to maintain and yeah I like the 'look'. The other 10% of the time when I decide to braid my hair/wear a wig I swear I get more play than I would have with the short nappy hair.
Is long hair a universal standard for cuteness and short hair a personal taste?
2. Out of one of my circles of friends, I've been tagged the most conservative dresser. My Pizzle cracks up every time I show her my latest 'vintage' purchase and she calls them maryamaka dresses. Conservative because I don't show cleavage (like I have cleavage to show sef...hisss), I don't do the tight minis, and I aint no born again christian...it's just not my style. Infact I'm more of the skinny jeans, a tee and some nice heels to the club or something of that casual chic nature. One day I decided to break out of the norm and gave them a mini shirt dress that showed my oh so lovely legs and hugged my figure 8 (Heheheheh). I swear I got mad looks of appreciation that day, even cats that see me around and never speak came up to say hi. I was convinced that the dress did it.
Universal standard vs personal taste?
All in all, it's pretty interesting. And I still ask: Who do the hot men date?
Guys, what type of chicks do you find yourselves gravitating to at social events?
Ladies, are you with me, or am I on my own with this one?
PS:- Post done in bits and pieces of doing everything else. Forgive the 'all over the place' nature of it.