Tuesday, November 18, 2008

The different perspectives on Wedding websites.

Chai! How can I explain the fact that I went for an entire month without blogging? It's not like I've been busy or like I no get internet. Na just LAZINESS.But the good book tells us to forgive and forget so forgive me. :D

Now on to the topic at hand....
Wedding websites! You knowarramean!!! They are the new rage, they are everywhere, we all stalk Omosewa's blog to get our weekly fix (The yeye girl no too dey on par with the updates sef...hisss!), we all wanna read the 'how we met' stories and look at the pics of the couple. Sometimes the proposal stories have us wondering why we never ran into such a dude in our life time i.e. proposing with a brand new car, flying her to Dubai and Bahamas, all that intricate and romantic stuff. Those kind of proposals have us thinking that if it was formerly acceptable for bobos to take us to PF Changs and do a simple proposal, these genge proposals finna have us wanting the bobos wey go even carry us to Naija, South Africa and Rome all in one weekend sef...hehehehe.Yup, yup...wedding websites are the thing right now and you know you love it!
But one day after running into a friend's ex-boyfriend's wedding website, I had to stop and think. The fact be say, this world na very small place and now it's no longer a case of you randomly stumbled across some random couple's site. These days you be randomly stumbling across the wedding website of someone you know.
Hence my inspiration for this post; The different perspectives on wedding websites. Oya grab ya nkwobi and odeku while you try and figure out which category you fall into.

Category 1:- The Innocent onlooker: Most of us fall into this category. You randomly came across the site; you've never even coughed within 20 miles of the couple. You read their story, ooohed and ahhed over their romantic tale and forwarded the site to your friends.

Category 2:- The Shakara woman: Oh yes! You know yourself! The bobo toasted you die but you made shakara. He blew up your phone, tried to wine and dine you but no o! ‘He’s too short’, ‘He’s too fat’, ‘He doesn’t drive a BMW’. You nexted him for those reasons. And then, he got the message and moved on. You didn’t see him again until Lo and Behold, your friend forwarded you his wedding website and your first thought was like DAMN! Bobo don lose 30 lbs, looks like he ate some beans and grew taller and cat damn, he proposed to his wife by flying her to the Bahamas and buying her a BMW. Internally, you just wither! You’re mentally kicking yourself like ‘O girl, you don eff up serious one o’. If only you had shaken bodi small, maybe na you for dey enjoy with a brand new beemer and a fresh tan from you vacay in the Bahamas, not to mention the blinding rock that would have been on your finger. Oh well, oh well…

Category 3:- The Ex:Once again, most of us fall into this category. Most, if not all of us have exes (Unless you’ve been living under a rock or you just lucked out and married the first man you dated). It doesn’t matter how things ended, could have been on a sour note or a good note but you run into his wedding website and you start to remember how good things were between you two. How he showed up at midnight on your doorstep with flowers in an effort to apologize for an argument y’all had, how he used to beat the nana realllll good during the make up kpansh session, how he went down south and stayed down south in the backseat of his ride that random night that y’all was feeling extra frisky, how he…..Ya dig! :DYou remember all these things, think about how the new wifey is gonna enjoy that for her lifetime and you sigh and move on.

Category 4:- The Other woman who aint know she was the other woman: Unfortunately, some of us do fall into this category. You met him on July 4, 2007 at the Naija reunion, he stepped to you and his game was tight. You were swayed and y’all got it on and poppin’. 1yr and a half later, he gave you some bullsheet reason for not wanting to carry on and it was the end of you and him. You’re still kinda salty about the way ish went down and whenever his name is mentioned, you still roll your eyes. One day, you randomly stumble across Omosewa’s blog and his wedding website is among the list of featured sites. You click on it and dammit! You can’t believe what you are reading. His how we met story says that he met his fiancée on that same July 4, 2007 and they have dated ever since.You are SPEECHLESS and very much saddened by the trifling nature of men in this present day and age…
And there you have it. I think I have covered the 4 main categories but if any others spring to mind, feel free to add.

Mgbeke is bizack!!!

PS:- Shoutouts to the Illmatic one for kinda, sorta inspiring this post.

22 comments:

Abujamaiden said...

I think this is my first time here but buahahahaha!!!!! Hilarious.

I'm on of the the first category's on looker.

To young to be bothered by marriage stuff though! I love wedding websites make me wonder ahead of time!

Anonymous said...

LOL...TEW FUNNY!!

NigerianDramaQueen said...

You this babe I be wan flog you well well for not updating...but because of this hilarious post (as always) your forgiven!

Omosewa got me hooked on wedding websites oh...I never even knew they existed b4 Omosewa.I always wonder where all these fantabulous 9ja men that fly people to the caribbeans and propose during picnics fell from. So far I've been in category 1 sha!

Oh btw guess what? you know that website you advertised, one tree snapshot? I got a hoodie and a tshirt from em..loving em!

Glad to have you back babes...dont stay away for too long again oh!

TayneMent said...

this babe you are too much, this is why I harass you to update frequently, you always hit the ogo on the right spot LMAO, the last category made me laugh, which makes me look forward to a certain website (if there will be one) make i calculate date :D

FFF said...

hehehehehehe. u don't know how relieved i am 2 only belong to category 1. maybe cos i think wedding websites r cheesy. i mean, like am happy 4 u guys & all, but i don't wanna abt how in love u r *rolling my eyes* lol. am not a romantic, & half of d time i think all those gists r just plain showing off

kmplx said...

LOL! manage to avoid stumbling onto them so far, but have been sent links and threats to be cincluded on some by a few friends. well-aimed disses quickly shut those plans down. gotta love naija trends.

Ms.O said...

HILARIOUS IS AN UNDERSTATEMENT!!!!...DAMN!!!! LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I am in the first category!! yay!!!..you better update soon or else...humphh!!!

Ms Sula said...

That was too funny!

How about the Happy Ex? No? Ok, I tried.

:)

Temite said...

Hehehehehe! This was so funnie. WOE!

AnyaPosh said...

HAHAHAHAH!!! my babe you too much. I love how you put everything into perspective.

I'm partly the innocent onlooker in most cases & will soon be the ex reminiscing about my ex's wedding. As u see me so, I don date plenty bobos...anyhow sha this february one of them go marry for portugal o! Na so de guy even get the audacity send me IV. How I for take reach Portugal? I'm a broke grad student na.

Anyway, it didn't work out with us becus I was looking for something different. Anyway, u need to see how my guy (abi ex-guy) propose to the gerlfriend. chai...he take the babe go cancun, na there him commot the rock o. As you see me sooo, I dey regret my life o... I for be the gerl wey dey rock that bling now.

But anyhow...good riddance, my guy was dodgy and we didn't have trust after he CHEATED.

My verdict: the guy go finish him wife with STD.

Iwalewa McDaniels said...

I am glad u finally updated.
I am always the innocent onlooker. I don't think I have stumbled on the website of anyone I know.

To expand on what Ms. Sula said, there has to be a happy ex category. The one who got married b4 the ex and is feeling sorry for the supposedly happy bride-to-be cos she knows that the groom-to-be is a complete idiot.

Favoured Girl said...

LOL, hilarious post!

I'm not addicted to viewing wedding websites, and even when I do, it's just because someone forwarded the link to me. So thankfully I've been in the innocent onlookers category. I got married before all my ex-bfs anyway so I have no pressure or regrets there!

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

hahahaha. Ooh, I can just imagine some chick seeing her ex's wedding website listed at Omosewa and spazzing out!

lol!

Emeka Amakeze said...

Mgbeke! Aha a i na-aza atogbuola m! Whatever category you mind tells you you belong to will not kill you as long as you still keep alive the dream of a-ring-tucked-in-a-beamer proposal. Don't forget the Bahamas vacation!

Bunmmy said...

lol gosh gal....u hammer d gist well well...lol gosh i love me some wedding webbies and men do i hate those purrrfect couples...lol

anyway my own de come soon

guerreiranigeriana said...

...interesting...i don't fall into any o!...i don't really do the whole wedding website thing, except friends of mine who are wedding...nice read though;)...

Afrobabe said...

Danggg you hit the nail on the head babes....I seem to fall into almost all categories...from innocent looker to shakara woman to ex...I just avoid wedding websites now!!!

Overwhelmed Naija Babe said...

lmao... this babe u wan kill me with laff oh.. yesu...im in category 1 oh... didnt really know wedding websites existed until earlier this year.. my bestie is addicted to omosewas website.. lol... have only seen one or two.. dont know how i feel about them in general.. theyre slightly cheesy i think but i guess thats the thing about love.. lol... but i sha miss u oh my luv... hope everything is everything 4 ur side... i cant even complain about ur blogging cos ive been worst... lol.. be good mama

dat one okrika girl...xyz said...

I have a love hate relationship with wedding websites sha, they make me bitter and angry but i just cant stop looking at them.

welcome back madame.

rethots said...

Wow!!! "His...story says that he met his fiancée on that same July 4, 2007..." this is simply awesome.

Dorah said...

Wedding websites are so wack. Naija ppl just trying to show off as usual. I'm soooo not having one. Much too rock 'n roll for that shit.

doll said...

nice