Wednesday, October 31, 2012
How Judgmental Are You?
I’m one of those people who always prides herself on how open minded and liberal I am in my views and general perception of the world. But in the recent days, I've realized that I am just as judgmental as they come. Granted, I don’t judge the typical things that most people judge but still...I do quite a bit of judging. In no particular order, here are a couple of things that I judge by default:
1. Grocery store purchases: As much as you might see me tweet about how I just wolfed down a bacon, egg and cheese on a croissant or a big ol’ burger and fries at McDonald's I actually have a guilty conscience when I go grocery shopping and so I tend to fill my cart with all the right stuff i.e. Fruits, veggies, water, wheat bread and all the good and healthy stuff that the fitness magazines instruct you to purchase. This also gives me some sense of superiority and allows me to shamelessly judge innocent citizens of the grocery store, who fill their carts with the bad stuff like ice cream, processed foods, frozen dinners and candy. This is a serious case of living in a glass house and throwing stones ‘cos I am the world’s biggest junk food-a-holic but hey, who says that life has to be fair? So odds are that if I’m standing behind you in line at the cash register, I am analyzing your purchases and judging the heck out of you. You have been warned.
2. Ratchetness: Who doesn't judge ratchetness? Heck I’m sure that even ratchet people judge their fellow ratchet people. Allow me feel all superior and on top of my A game as I judge your multi-toned weave, blue contacts, claw-like acrylic nails, and every other thing that makes you ratchet.
3. Eyebrows: Someone on my Twitter timeline has tweeted this in the past: “You can tell how razz an individual is from her eyebrows” and I definitely cannot disagree. Ninety nine percent of the of the time, razz eyebrows = razz individual. Granted, razz is the new cool and things, but can I still judge? My friend used to upload daily BBM pics of his girlfriend with some catdamn maroon penciled in eyebrows and I used to low-key judge her. Thankfully she has gotten hip to the game and is no longer about that life. The Lord be praised.
4. Lazy asses: If you’re one of those cats who takes the elevator one floor up or down i.e. from the 10th floor to the 11th floor, I’m definitely judging your lazy azz.
5. People who wear Sunshades indoors/in the reception hall on their wedding day/at night: Need I say more? You look like a clown. Judged.
6. Weaves: This one might get more than a few eye rolls but you know what? I have a love/hate relationship with weaves. Yes, they supposedly up your ‘hmmph factor’, and I can’t front…some people look very glam and well packaged with them. On the flip, I feel that a lot of women over-rely on weaves. People like to give the “convenient and easy to maintain” excuse which is all well and good, but can we see your own God-given hair be it permed or natural like once every 365 days? And dayum even if you insist on weaving it up 24/7/365, must it be 72 inches long and so catdayum horsehair looking?? Judged.
7. Unnecessary Effizy: You went to the club, popped $1,000 worth of drinks and twit-pic’d the receipt? Judged. You bought a new range and created a Facebook album to inform the world of this purchase? Judged. You’re buying out and getting buried in the Gucci sto’ and had to post a tweet to inform the world? Judged. The truest effizy boys and girls are the ones who do all of the above and don’t consider any of that stuff to be a big deal.
That’s all for now folks. If you fell into any of the above categories...in the words of 2baba "One love my people". Soooo, what do you people judge? I’m all ears (abi eyes).
PS: - Hope y’all doing good. How did my East coasters hold up during Hurricane Sandy? All well and good, I hope.
Peace & Love.