Friday, April 25, 2008

What's your Number?

So I was reading Afro babe's blog about the double standards when it comes to wimmens and sex. And I decided that I would create a some guidelines for some scandal-free chooking. (Thank me later)....

...Just because we all know that the number of men you've been with is such a huge deal to some of our Naija men.

And of course, I'm all about abstinence and blah blah but I realize say bodi no be firewood. :)

So mai ladies...especially my Naija ladies. You wanro chook die, but you get rep to protect? Follow these guidelines and everything go dey Ok. Hehehehehehe.....

1. Whatever you do, He MUST not be Nigerian (In terms of a Chook buddy, 1 night stand etc etc). So pretty much aim for Akata, Oyibo, Jamo..even Chinko sef go do the work.
2. If possible, target a man that doesn't live in your neck of the woods/Your hood/Your state/ Your country sef...lol
3. Chook away!!!! Keep it safe though.
4. Assuming you finally meet the Naija man of your dreams (If that's what you're looking for), and he asks you how men you've been with...*Pay attention ladies*..lol. Let's say you've been with a total of 10 men. Out of these 10, 7 of them were non-Naija...you know what to do. You simple maintain your angelic demeanour and tell him that you've been with 3 guys.
5. Invite me for your wedding. Ha Ha Ha!

Have a great weekend y'all.

29 comments:

dat one okrika girl...xyz said...

~slides in takes notes for "my cousins" and slides back out...

Sting said...

LOL, u are funny. I like number 4 though.

desperate lady said...

lol i had to stop by after seeing ur name "original mgbeke", ur name is funny, ur post is funny.

soupasexy said...

lol@dat one okrika girl.
mgbeke, u too much sha...lol

vindication through innocence said...

lol!!you have the right idea- i could not have said it better myself! nice blog...shame in not into gbenshing...ok its not a shame-

NigerianDramaQueen said...

You never fail to make me laugh! Never

Charizard said...

ehrrhemm...heehhhemm...r ur postulations based on actual experiences?

36 INCHES OF BROWN LEGS said...

Lol. nice post!!!

ablackjamesbond said...

Its a good thing naija men r reading this too...we will simply ask:
3 guys + what?

naijalines said...

Very naughty, a babe after my own heart! You said it well sista!

Lol @ ablackjamesbond. 3 men na 3 men now. Thankfully there's no meter.

Sabira said...

LMAO!!!

Afrobabe said...

scandal free choking??? I got to read this..lol

Afrobabe said...

lmao..oh my gosh, that was a great read...But seriously Chinko...hahahahahaha...abeg I go hold body..

I actually told a guy I had been with 4 guys all mu life, this was recently but looked like I was convincing enough cos I never heard from the goat again...

mchewwww!!! off to find akata or Jamo!!!

Afrobabe said...

and by the way lol @ okrika girl...

Now I slide out again...before am kicked off this page...

one more smile, a girl after my own heart...

Jarrai said...

Lmao!!!
I'm liking number four...
Not sure abount chinko dudes....heard they are a bit tiny down south...lol

Original Mgbeke said...

LMAO. Y'all killing me with these comments.

Morountodun said...

How you title ya post "whats your number" and you no give us your own?

ablackjamesbond said...

Where is ur Mgborie?

Free-flowing Florida said...

hehehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehehe

3 bah!

i likey

lol @ blackjamesbond: 3 men + what. if u ask dat kain question, i go attack u 'wetin u mean? three no do? abi u want make e be 20? u nko? i ask u question?' by d time i hala finish, u go just learn 2 no ask too many questions

Ms Sula said...

Girl, I'm mad at you... How can you publish rule #503 of the Good Girl Handbook like that, ehn?

Anyways, good thing Rule #506 states that we shall pardon our brethren who tries to enlighten the masses!

Hilarious post!

Zephi Fahrenheit said...

omg lmao...your indeed razz

Ms.O said...

OMG!!!!...BAHAHAHAHAHAHA...SO TRUE...am dating a naija man nw..told him i been with 4..he believes me..chai!!!!!..if only!!!..Oopsss

rethots said...

Brilliant calculations...."You simple maintain your angelic demeanour and tell him that you've been with 3 guys." and since "He MUST not be Nigerian" then, NON a truthful answer (which will produce the biggest smile from him).

Win-win, what do you think?

tobenna said...

I'm sure this will probably be one of your most commented posts.
Firstly, your name - Original Mgbeke is fantastic. Are you really an mgbeke?

Secondly, I haven't heard the word 'chook' in a long time. That cracked me up. Dang!

Thirdly, I have to go and really ask my fiance(e) how many men she has really slept with. I need the true details. Not like I would do anything with it though. Not really a big deal. Or so I think.

Smaragd said...

TOBENNA, pls leave well enough alone o!

Original Mgbeke, i cant believe i've been missing out on ur posts for so long! u are too much!

Charizard said...

ashewo Oshi!

lol...before u rip ma head apart...I meant that in the sweetest of tone...lol...

AnyaPosh said...

HAHA... this idea of chooking's got me thinking. And as per doing the Chinko...I no fit abeg.

Alyn said...

Good post.

Anonymous said...

why u dey give out our secrets like dat now?