Thursday, June 25, 2009

The fast life will age you...

27, and I've been there, done that.
I started out when I was 14, when those rumors were circulating.
Yup, those rumors. The ones about him and I being caught doing the nasty in the bushes.
Talk about adding salt and pepper to tori, all he did was finger me but trust people to over -exaggerate the story.
It was pretty embarrassing to have the whole world in my business but I covered it and I put my game face on.
Life went on, everyone moved on to the next gist and I carried on.
17, and I had graduated from secondary school and on my way to University.
As a new and fresh jambite, I got snatched up pretty quickly.
It was pretty exhilarating to be with one of the older guys, he was in the 300 level and pretty well known around campus.
We started having sex pretty soon, and he insisted that if I loved him, I would give him my goodies as often as he wanted it. Turns out that he wanted it like every day.
And everyday I obliged, because I loved him and truth be told, I loved the sex too.
He told me not to bother coming to his off-campus residence when I had my period so on those days, I stayed away...I hung with my girls instead.
By the time I turned 19, I was tired of it all. The sex was starting to get old and come on...my vagina had to breathe.
My boyfriend must have also gotten tired of my once precious goodies because he broke up with me eventually and moved on to another woman.
And so it was back to square 1 for me. I met more guys, got into a scandal or two...
There was that one time that Kate came to my hostel to confront me because she found out that I had been sleeping with her man on the low low.
It got pretty ugly and once again was embarrassing for me but who cared? I had already earned some kind of reputation around town anyway.
'Slut', 'Whore', 'Nympho', 'Public Toilet'...the list was endless. The women turned up their noses at me and the men just wanted to get in my pants.
By 20, I was learning that I couldn't just give my goodies away for free. I had to be making some money too like the other Ariztos girls were...
I loved sex, so why couldn't I make money off it too?
I started to meet with older men who would sleep with me and give me money. Lots of it...it paid off too because my father was a retired school teacher who didn't have much money to share amongst my 5 siblings and I, and so with the money that I acquired from my sugar daddies, I could pay the rent for me on-campus accomodations and buy myself some clothes and nice things.
My rep advanced from that of a general slut to that of an Ariztos girl.
But the fast life wasn't that kosher. By the time I was 22, I had 4 abortions. One time I had an STD scare, but all turned out to be well.
Did I learn though? Nope...I carried on doing what I did best. Don't judge me, you might have done the same if you were in my shoes.
Trips to Abuja to meet men, trips to Lagos and on one lucky occasion, a shopping trip to London. I was doing it big...I covered these trips up to my parents under the guise of going to my girlfriend's village for weddings and what not.
I even got a nice car from one of my men, which I kept parked on campus because I could not have explained this one to my parents.
Despite the glamorous appearance of it all, I was paying dearly for everything.
I gained about 50lbs...I can attribute that to the good life and sperm. No joke, sperm will do wonders to the female body.
Eventually, I got old to the men. They were looking for fresh meat and I was far from that. I still have a reputation around town...when men ask 'Do you know Amaka?' the usual response is 'Which Amaka? Is it Amaka E?' and then 'Ahhhh, leave story'.
Sadly, that is the type of reputation that I have.
I look in the mirror and internally I feel disgusted by what I see; a shadow of the innocent young girl that I used to be but to be honest, I really can't change things. This is who I am...
The money was like a drug, and I recently moved to Abuja...a town where I am unknown and resumed my Ariztos duties. After living that kind of lifestyle, it is hard to go back to my old one before all the money, ah ah...I too want to be a bigger babes.
People meet me and instantly think that I am 32. The fast life will age you...it has certainly aged me.

48 comments:

bumight said...

marking my spot...

akaBagucci said...

Perhaps that there is still disgust in the mind of the writer seems to suggest that there is still hope......

Rene said...

She could change things if she wanted to....all she has to do is to be ready to give up on the 'aging' things.
I believe there's hope

bumight said...

yup! Life in itself will age you, but the fast life will definitely age you..faster

leggy said...

im so glad dat i gt to the end and it wasnt u.

Penelope said...

totally agree with leggy...as i was just reading i was like *shuoo*!
wow this person has tried oh. I don't even know what to say.

UnderCover07 said...

Lol @ Penelope. But yea for a second I was in shock...But I believe that there is hope for anyone willing to stretch out their hand to it.

On a lighter note sha ooo...does sperm rili do "wonders for the female body"? Ddn't knw dat one oo.

SouLBoutiQue said...

While I was reading this I couldn't help but think about the movie Jenifa...'I want to be a Biggz girls!' lol....let me go and sleep jare!
Ag

blogoratti said...

Yep,it sure will.

Lady X said...

Yee!
I thot it was you o I was like huh? Lemme read that again for a minute. It's never too late for her to change! Or anyone for that matter...

downtheaisle said...

The money was like a drug...... so she was addicted?

Dis story reminds me of aristo chics during uni days.They have exotic cars they neva take home.

yankeenaijababe said...

Thank God it wasn't you, definitely living life in the fast lane ages people fast, very hard to be a big girl for those who want it.

Hope your wedding planning going great.

Anonymous said...

In the event that it is the blogger or not as the case may be. The person obviously knows the choice she made, was not the best and has used this as an example to others. She seems to show remorse which is the first step to a solution.

Kate said...

Who was sleeping with my man on the low low and why was i not notified of it? :)
Um..Mgbeks..is this a true story or the excerpt from a book?..cuz me i want to read the whole book.

Tigeress said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tigeress said...

And so what if it was actually Mgbeke? What difference wld it have made? Since it's not her- does that make you feel better that you dont have to judge ur fellow blogger that u like? All of una wey dey fornicate with ur bf in the name of relationship/love and this aristo chick are all the same thing in the eyes of God- fornicators!!!!!

Pls check out our critic on Reloaded http://ftfilmcritics.blogspot.com/

yinkuslolo said...

eh, tigeress just addressed my concern. despite the fact that mgebek is anonymous, if she's the amak in this story. my judgement would be somewhat biased.

CultureCynic said...

The fast life doesn't always age you, it can also liberate you or set u up for life with enough money saved up to invest in a proper psychiatrist and a plastic surgeon. i am unsettled with the implication that the trajectory of a sexually liberated woman is a dead end. The idea that she is somehow now 'used up' bothers me, men sleep wit 1020 women and they are rockgods, but because she played in the SEXOLYMPICS we have encourage her to retire her jersey. Ok this 'heroine' needs to invest in some new friends and move her ass elsewhere where no one will remind her how used up and aged she is ....one man's Madonna is another one's Mary.....Now i fault her for her irresponsibility, condoms am certain where made before 1982 so therefore there is absolutly no how she hadn't heard of condoms, so why she will let random ppl jizz in her to make her FAT is beyond me....i am MAD she let herself go like that.....nothing a gym memebership and rubber strapping couldn't have prevented.
she should defintly go get one of those botox rejuvinating touch ups that they adminster into the V jay jay, her equipment will be good as new.


everyone gets used, the point is not to get misused or abused....she is only as used up as she presents herself, she could be ANYONE...circumstances and opportunities direct people..she should own her past and keep it moving!

ShonaVixen said...

I'm so with Tigeress and Anonymous ...no matter who this Amaka is ie the blogger or just a story, its not our place to play judge n jury...lets just be listeners, offer support or advice..BUT judge lets try and defer from it!!

justdoyin said...

lol @ Kate wanting 2 read d whole book...

yup, I agree that d fast life will definitely age one...but let's thank God that at least she seems dissatisfied (even if addicted to) with what she does...that means there's hope 4 her redemption...it is well. I hope she finds someone who'll show her true love, so she can stop living on the fast lane n settle down asap...

BBB said...

she made her choice and chose to live that kind of life..
when she is ready she will stop

Tigeress said...

Actually is it just me- cos i didnt read anywhere where it says this Amaka person isnt actually the blogger.

Fast life aging you? How did yawl come to that conclusion? I mean we are not talking about drugs here. I believe when u say the fast life u're referring to frequent and regular sex right? So regular sex makes you age? unbelieavable!!!! Then those male players shld look aged and haggered. Looking young doesnt come natural for some folks.

Original Mgbeke said...

Thanks for the comments, everyone. I'll reply a general one this time around. LOL, so what if I am Amaka? Should it matter?
Anyway, for people who found this story shocking, the truth is that there are a lot of women who live this lifestyle. A lot of them mainly start doing it as a means to survive i.e Their sugar- daddies provide them with their daily means of survival + a little extra cash. And once you get used to that seemingly glamorous lifestyle, it gets kinda hard to turn back.
Tigeress made a good point in saying that we shouldn't be quick to judge. A lot of us are probably engaging in pre-marital sex and getting a maximum of a $100 shopping trip every other month, so it seems that the Ariztos girls are at least making something work for them. LOL
True talk though, like Shona said...let's listen, offer support and advice but let's not judge.

Tigeress: Playing the Devil's advocate, in Amaka's own words...'The fast life will age you'. That's the POV of the narrator, some other women are flying high on the clouds of sexual liberation and they no send. And LOL, according to magazines like Glamour & Cosmopolitan, regular sex gives you a youthful glow. :-p

Culture C: Unfortunately, this is the type of world that we live in. Tell a man that you've been with 50men and watch him RUN. I honestly believe that even if you have been with 50 men, if you carry yourself in confidence and never think of yourself as a 'ho' then you are good to go, in other words...'ho-ism is a state of mind', and your numbers should not define you. Anyone may please feel free to disagree with me.
Even if the whole world thinks you are X, as long as you consider yourself to be Y then nothing do you.

Interesting responses all around.

TayneMent said...

I don't necessarily agree that the fast life will age you rather when you make decisions that you yourself are unhappy with, the unhappiness and stressing over it will age you. On the flip side, there are ladies who do the same thing as the subject matter and don't see anything wrong with what they are doing, infact they will never let themselves go (sperm ko, sperm ni, laziness is what makes one fat, lol). The character seems to be unhappy with her decision.

Third World Profashional said...

Lord that was some story! Thought it was you at first, i come fear o! But its all reality and not just in Nigeria, it happens everywhere. We thank God for strength of will, self confidence and content with our lot in life that prevents us from turning out that way.

CultureCynic said...

my point exactly...dont ask dont tell...and if and when u tell, stand by it and do you! you are who u present yourself to be. it is all relative really.If she walks around feeling all used up, then thats how people will treat her. the 'dead end' bit is the perseved implication of the authors description, it makes the Amaka sounds in need of redemption, without any undertones that she at least enjoyed it, instead all i got from it was this sort of regret and longing for how it never was. like i said the fast light don't have to age yo, it can even open your eyes, make you rich, get you liberated, depends on how you look at it. i dont actually see this girl as morally defective , i actually wish she would own up to it and not sound like she is apologizing for her past. every Amaka is not Jenifa, they can also turn out to be like Julia Roberts in that movie about a ho and captain save a ho. Runaway Bride anyone....?? ;-P

it is just SEX at the end of the day, ppl need to get the eff over it....but let her please invest in condoms ...all this fattening up on spearm dikwa very risky... a diet devoid of it will help her see the light, that was my main issue!!!

and for you to now quote Glamour and Cosmo.....i am not even gonna poke fun on that one hehehehe...it's like that one time that Samantha told Charlotte and Miranda that.......he

olu said...

...and truth be told, I LOVED THE SEX TOO. I love the honesty of that statement.

I hear people say stuff like "Sex is sex. It doesn't matter if one is getting paid or not." I think it does cos the money mortgages ones dignity.

If that's the life she wants, then what's the big deal (Everyone has their life to lead). If not, she can change. It's never too late - for HER or anyone else.

Easier said than done. I know, I know. Life isn't easy.

Repressed One said...

A couple of people have said what i was thinking...the person in the story is obviously unhappy with the choices she has made and is dealing the the consequences [whatever they are].

It's interesting tho that she seemed to have a nonchalant attitude about it all when she was in college and had her 'game face' on but somewhere along the line it became a means to an end...I'd imagine that's where the aging set it.

Kemberly said...

Very interesting and very..very...COMMON! I'm not going to judge anyone, all I can say is that whenever she's ready to quit this lifestyle, she will.

LOL...I actually played MI's "Fast Money Fast Cars" while I read this! Lol!

chayoma said...

Mgbekos at a point, i thot this was your story for a minute oh!

But "Amaka" can change oh, if she discards her old life, for a brand new one!

Brokeass said...

She doesnt sound like she is ready to leave just yet, even though she knows what it does....



Does the story continue?

NigerianDramaQueen said...

Babes,
It's amazing how much your writing style has improved (and it was great to start with). I utterly enjoyed reading this! Keep up the good work!

Nice Anon said...

This is a good story you put up here Mgbafo m.

Funny you know because a lot of chics get shagged over a dinner and a movie which isn't even up to 50 bucks depending on how you HE took you for dinner.
Not saying it makes it any better but think before you speak

BSNC said...

Somebody didn't have it so easy. the fast lane may have aged her, but there is still hope.

she has to make the first step and start from somewhere.

Ada said...

"She likes dem adenuga types, she needs a man to her glo.." MI
reminds me of that song.

Reverence said...

LMAO @ hoism doesn't define you. i honestly don't know what to say on the one hand you want to feel sorry but on the other hand its like hey u made a choice. i tire jare

P.S guess what has shipped?

tunrayo said...

It really doesn't matter who the story is about. the fact still remains that all of us know at least one person like this. My bestfriend(if i dare call her that) has a very similar story(wonder wat that says about me)....xcept of course, she doesnt have the car...yet.

I'm very sure this young lady, being a Nigerian and all, has had enough of religion and definetely knows right from wrong. If she is over 18(which she is), it becomes a personal decision and the choice to change can only come from her when she is good an ready. The fact that she is still involved means that in more ways than one, she is still enjoying her current life style. (no judgement what so ever)

Yep, i also read the cosmo article about regular sex being healthy...and im in support of the fact that the weight gain is all her fault. i mean why are some 50 year old women still trim? self discipline, exercise...definetly not sitting in one corner wallowing in self pity. If she is ready to change, she will.

*Diane* said...

this stuck out to me
"I look in the mirror and internally I feel disgusted by what I see; a shadow of the innocent young girl that I used to be but to be honest, I really can't change things."
intense story.
"amaka" sounds like she wants to change and leave this life behind. she just needs to realize (or someone needs to help her and show her) that as long as you're alive, change is possible.We simply have to ask God for strength and perseverance because it prob won't be easy, but it is possible...
is there more to this story? i feel like i was left hanging....Mbgeks, rectify this asap.lol

RocNaija said...

Culture Cynic and Nice Anon read my mind on this one.

A la Kimberly, nice writing style.

Geebee said...

Very original piece.Very true conjecture. The fast life, fun as it seems definitely makes the person living it age faster than usual. The painfulpart is the addiction you get from living it. Even when you realise you need to slow down, step on the brakes and get out, it becomes practically impossible. Reason: Addiction. The ‘fast life’ to the personliving it is like a drug the body can’t do without. This one takes special grace from God to handle. But then, some have been there and today they’re out for good.

Ms. Royal Reigns said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ms. Royal Reigns said...

Public Toilet?! Public Toilet. That's it! I've found my new insult. "Shut up, you Public Toilet!" Haha. Gonna save that gem for my non-Nigerian friends.

The 1st couple paragraphs I was like, "OM...fingered @ 14? Oookay." LMAO! Then I realized it was a story and my heart was @ ease.

Well, I kinda feel bad for the girl. Probably something happened in her childhood for her to be going that route. Granted at 27, she's still "young" enough to be doing her business. But what is she gaining from it? Money? Money can only do oh so much. Is she trying to fullfill something? Fill a void in her life? She has start realizing that going bout with these escapades will only hinder her much further in the future. She can't continue this when she is 30..35..40. I mean, it'll just get worse & worse. She has to fight through it. She has to transition at some point in her life, no?

Funms-the rebirth said...

I cant even comment cuz Tigeress comments are so hilarious

Anonymous said...

Wow!....I used to live this life before...well something similar and it was really nice and fun while it lasted but I am glad I dont anymore.

uNWrItten* said...

well written....i am impressed

Tisha said...

It touched me because i have a things for helping women and children...

i think Amaka needs to meet the most high. Once He changes her from inside, she will do the external changes.

Its not about wanting to "shape up", its about wanting to please God, it will make things easy.

Anonymous said...

Well, some people take coding to another level. Had a friend who never said a word to me about her engagement only for me to see the photos of the introduction/engagement party on Facebook with the rest of the world.
Congratulated her and asked her about her Wedding plans but she acted all cagey about it.
Thought she was my personal person but I guess she had already Friendship Detox-ed me without me realizing it.

Anonymous said...

Oops, sorry. Wrong place for that comment. Meant to comment on 'The Coding Issue' but this tab was open as well. Please don't publish, will redress the mistake right now.