Thursday, January 7, 2010

Those frontin' azz Naija babes...

Happy new year my peoples. I hail una oooo...how has the '10 been treating you guys so far?

On to the koko of the matter...

I've been having a lot of convos with men that revolve around the fronting nature of we Nigerian girls. They usually identify me as the poster child of women who don't front and then say something along the lines of 'that is so refreshing, because a whole lot of you Nigerian women front too much'. And so, I have appointed myself as Voltron, defender of all Nigerian women.
This is the Q that I usually throw back at them...'Can you please define fronting?', and till date I have never really got a clear cut definition.

I mean for real, what exactly constitutes fronting??
Oh, and I find it extra interesting when some of these men say 'Nigerian women front too much, to toast you women is a huge hassle and that is why I don't date y'all'. LOL...like I once told a culprit...'I highly doubt that Nigerian women are crying over this'. Like seriously dudes, no woman's world has crashed yet because you took your business elsewhere, don't get too excited now...
...But back to the Q...what exactly constitutes fronting??

I think that a lot of men who accuse us ladies of fronting need to work on their approach to begin with. For instance, today on the train I sat with 3 Nigerian dudes (coincidence), one of them randomly struck up convo, they all introduced themselves and when I introduced myself, they found out that I was a Naija babe...I kept it relatively friendly, we chatted about clubs in DC vs. Baltimore, our famed Naija terrorist and some random other ish and before I hopped off the train, one of them said...'So why don't you give us your number, maybe we can hang out one of these weekends when you are free'...(I had kinda sorta seen it coming, from his general interaction with me).
Me, I kuku said...'Oh, like y'all share a phone or something?' and his boys cracked up and said that I had jokes. I mean, in 2010...people are saying 'give us your number??'...seriously??...and then since the joke was on him, he said 'Oh I mean, give me your number' and I gave the generic 'Well, are you on FB? I can look you up on there instead' with absolutely no intention of doing such.
Now if you ask the man if he thought that I was fronting, he might tell you a big 'heck yeah'!...If you ask me, heck no I wasn't going to give him my digits.
1. That was a 30 minute train ride. I was chatting with him + 2 other men, it wasn't even no one on one ish...what kind of connection did the man think that we had, that we should now be exchanging numbers?
2. That 'give us your number' wackness totally did him in.


Nigerian men, that is one example of how you lot can change your approach when it comes to us ladies. It seems like a lot of you cats are into the whole 'fast food love' kinda deal...if you meet Girl A and she doesn't share her digits in the space of 1 hr, she is suddenly fronting. Oya now, carry go.

Then you got those clowns who come up to you at parties and rudely grab you for some wack ass grindin'. I mean...seriously though? From where to where now? So when a very pissed off woman turns around to give you that grade A evil eye, you're like 'Nigerian women too dey front sha o, a bro can't even get a dance'. Yup, we won't roll with that foolishness so call it whatever you wanna call it.

And then sometimes, the women that you'se lot are interacting with are just plain ol' reserved and not as forthcoming. You wanna talk about sex, she doesn't feel too comfy discussing sex...you say that she is fronting.
You just met her and maybe she's not the type to be shining her 32 any and anyhow, so her reception to you wasn't as warm as you would have wanted it to be, you say that she is fronting.
I actually had a convo with a friend who told me that a good % of the girls that he's met who went to my secondary school initially came off as some major fronters and of course he issued the disclaimer of 'you were different'...so I asked him how the babes were fronting, and he said that when he met the good number that he's met and got introduced to them, they gave him a couple of dry hi's and hello's or something like that. LOL...na wa o!
Mind you, I met him at a club in Chicago and err...there is only so much fronting or chilly hello's that one can dish out and receive in a club setting and so that left no room for any potential fronting. Hahahaha...maybe if he had met me under different circumstances, I might have been on the list of 'those Feddy girls who front too much'. Hilarity!

So to conclude this matter, seriously guys...before you're quick to point accusing fingers at frontin' azz Nigerian girls, why don't you take a step back and analyze your approach (in simple English: Step your game up honey) and the way you are viewing the situation...sometimes it really aint what you make it out to be.

But not too disagree with the fact that yes, there are some Naija babes who are on a whole 'nother P sha ooo but that is besides the marra. :-)

Alrighty, time to sign off. Before I go sha o, nna meeeen this cold don do me strong thing o, chei! No place to hide mayne, e be laik say cold front full ground for everywhere including Miami. I truly no blame those babes who don organize some 'winter runs'. Nahmeannn? Hahahaha...God dey sha, My Lord will keep me warm or as my babe Nicey m go tok...'The Lord is on the throne'...:-D

G'nite mi loves. I promise to make some real blog rounds this weekend.

46 comments:

The Nigerian Fetish said...

Yes girl! I had a similar issue. I didn't want to talk to this dude because he came out of no where with this rude comment mentioning my lips. Then I told him about himself. He then proceeded to tell me that, "This is why I don't date Igbo gals". While him, his self was Igbo. He claimed that Igbo women think they are "all that" and are to arrogant for his liking.

Connection to your post is that men, always, always , ALWAYS like to pin it down to something of their downfall to the female, just because the female didn't fall for their weak approach.

48 said...

Lmao @ my God shall keep me warm! Frealz some body heat would be nice, even tejas is feeling the cold. But errrm fronting sha, I'm too much of a simple babe/straight-shooter to be a fronter. Altho I must say that there are times I wish I wasn't so straightforward cos men, no matter what they say, like the challenge/games*rolls eyes* Plus likeability is key cos like you said...aint nobody gonna want to dish out their numbers to some weirdo who doesn't understand the concept of simple manners/respect. Happy new year babes.

leggy said...

Lol.I like this oh.most Nigerian girls who they don't accuse of fronting always turn around and start talking about how Nigerian girls front.

Tatababe said...

LOL!!!! Happy new year lady! its been a minute. You said it all really, dudes need to step their game up yo!

BBB said...

fronting indeed
lets call it the plain truth
we are not interested and it hurts ur ego

burramint said...

happy new year!!
abeg dont mind them they enjoy the supposed "fronting" i mean where would the fun be?
And you so right about the approach being their main fault. i mean how am i supposed to hear anything you say after you've been calling me baby within 5mins of meeting me? hiss abeg next! lol

Gee said...

VOLTRON!!!
LOL!
happy new year!!
lol @ "give us ur number"--like really hu says dat?

Nice Anon said...

LOL Speaking of cold someone yesterday said to me " Ah this one you are still up are you cold?? I have body heat" As if!!! Ha haaaa@shining 32. My dear the thing tire persin. Manner of approach is everything. Give us your number ko?
I seriously weak for men jare. The thing is quite frankly and honestly tiring !!!
I am saying off men this 2010

Omosi T said...

CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP.

Geebee said...

Nicely written, Voltron. Not a point missed. . . and what actually passes as fronting? To me, it's all a conclusion reached by individuals and that hardly makes it correct. If some guy feels a gurl is fronting, let him do his own fronting as well. Tit for tat

My world said...

I am so happy that you brought up this issue cos I dont get it maself.....what exactly is fronting?
Nice piece,dear!

Enkay said...

Happy New year OM!

if the gal isn't into you, why not just pack your ego put inside bag and walk away?
Don't go around saying stuff about her jo!

Writefreak said...

Happy new year...and sending some warmth your way!

Fronting..me i don't know what it means o!

ifeoma odogwu said...

lol @ bbb. seriously if a girl is not feeling ur p, step it up or move on instead of saying she's frontin. abi na by force?.i was eating alone sometime ago some guy comes to my table, makes small talk, jokes around u noo. i talk to him politely, after sometime he slides his phone across 2 me and asks do u mind?. of course i do!!!

Fierce said...

Voltron, you're so right. What in the world would make me want to talk to a guy who asks where I live right after I tell him I will not give him my NAME!!! Sheesh! Talk about inexperience. It's just a real shame that there's so many of them. Oh well, c'est la vie!
:)
xoxo

Mwajim Al said...

I agree its definitely cold oooo... am glad am not the only one. I share ur pain (am in the balt/d.c area too). On a more serious note though, ur entry had me cracking up, it was quite an eye-opener because ave often wondered what guys mean when they use the term "fronting"!

Ms.O said...

I think Nigerians girls DO front and form... But it is what makes us different from the whole lot out there. But then again what is fronting...sigh!

Rita said...

My dear, it is neededful for the ladies.

However, that guy that wanted u to give "them" ur number, I might have read it differently. I would think he was the shyest of the pack of 3, didnt want to come out clear that he has an interest (of some sort) yet wants to feel like the one who got u 1st.

Meanwhile, Happy New Year.

Writefreak said...

You know i thought the same thing as Rita, i just didnt know how to articulate it

LushChic said...

hahahaha @ "can you give us ur number"....
me sef tire for naija guys o!!!

Anonymous said...

Pls keep blogging I just love ur stories.
This issue of "frontin" is serious sha if its not frontin its shakara... Im tired. The babe is not interested she is now frontin abi?? 2010 no time for these dudes giving it straight to them hiss... Oh and apparently the new "give me ur digits" is whats ur pin (bbm) lol chaaaii

mizchif said...

I always love ur how you say your own.
I wish there was a dictionary definition for forming, cuz some blokes be classifying refusal to visit their place after one date as forming. Like seriously? GTFOH!

On one hand, i think given the general egotistic way some men are, they can't understand when they are turned down by a babe...DUDE, she's just not that into you, GET IT!

Myne Whitman said...

What is the definition of fronting I ask? Whose should we use then, they guy's or the babes? You preach it jare. I think naija guys forget themselves sometimes.

Anonymous said...

*patiently waiting for guys' comments*

Enoch said...

LMAO

D truth b say d wahala dey for both genders.

Chukwuma after running things as a local champion in his village with 2minutes-and-I'm-in-your-panties chics, crosses the Atlantic with the assumption that a chic's phone number is his constitutional right.

On the other hand, some babes get attention from nothing but spineless blokes and when Mr. Suave comes along, his measured advances are misinterpreted as 'very rude' and babe gets a high outta administering an undeserved whiplash.

Your post made me laugh a lot but remember that one woman's poison is another woman's salad.

meenana said...

ROFLMAO!!! now that was a good read

David.фаворит Бога номер-один said...

LWKMD!!!!
na vex you take enter this year?
LOL!!!
Happy New Year!

blackrubies said...

That was so true! and intresting.
I don't like giving people my number and am usually very guarded against people I just meet, its not me fronting sha..thats just the way i am.
But Nigerian guys need 2 stop doing that u 'naija girls' watever, they should take a good look at themselves 2
Happy new yr!!

yankeenaijababe said...

Happy New Year to You o..love ur blog and style of writin, no mind them local Naija boyz, na them sabi.lol

yankeenaijababe said...

Stay warm girlie, l hate winter..sucks!

Reverence said...

lol.. are we in high school? i swear any guy that uses the word front around me automatically gets nexted.

i honestly don't thinK people "front" any more. our generation is too impatient for that.

Nifemi Buki Ayomide said...

first time here and this was too funny - Enoch, u r crazy for real - i don't understand fronting sha, but to each their own i say

olu said...

'Fast food love.' That's priceless. ::rolling on the floor::

The generalization of Naija babes fronting is wrong, but, let's face it, some PEOPLE front.

I like your take on this 'issue', if I can call it that.

Happy New Year.

uNWrItten* said...

girl...ur not the only one...the cold don do me tire...i need a human snuggie...
as for naija boys...i don tire for their wahala i swear..they say we front too much but they are too damn cocky...sheesh...

..Moyo said...

So my brother tells me he loves my sisters and I because we don't front. We're real and straight up and blah-di-blah.
He says it in the sense that if we're shitting, we no dey shame to talk am.
I think it's all fronting. The girl's probably not giving you her number or dancing with you cause she thinks you're not nice looking or wealthy enough but if its one nonsense boy that borrowed Gucci and Versace now, she would give him so yes women do front.
But it's only because they are shallow. I give everyone my number only because I know I can block you if you talk nonsense to me on my phone and I can always ignore your call and blame it on "network issues" or one other stupid sometin. Everyone wants a boy to step up his game, does the sister have game too though? Because who knows one day, it'd be your turn to make your dream man actually notice you soooo ..
I'm not shallow - I love "game"less boys because it means I'm giving him a chance in life.
I lost the plot but yeah, thanks, bye.

muyiwa said...

lwkmd,for babes wey organize winter runz

Beulah! said...

Very funny!..Loved the part "so u guys all share same phone?"...LOLOL

One3snapshot! said...

Okay first off. I'm mad you didn't give him your number. So he faux pas'd and said us...but obviously he was trying something. How else are you supposed to find out more about him and if you wanna get to one on one him more.

Lol...it's funny when I've heard things like that from Naija guys in reference to like oh you're different...and I laugh 'cos I'm not...at the end of the day I'm still a woman and women want the basic things...soon enough I will be nagging and doing everything else 'frontin azz Naija babes' do.

rethots said...

Opinions are personal, facts are sacred.

If 'em ladies front, move on
.....who cares?
.....why complain?

Thot the world is round?

joicee said...

Happy new year O
Lol @ Give US your number ...dude must have been smoking some of that goood ish...

I just thinkng the same about this extra cold tempertaures all over...there goes global warming.

Deji D said...

How come you and that Sugar King padi always have interesting transportation related stories? Ehn?

I laughed well well at that "give us your number." Maybe they all wanted to "see and cater to you at the same time" lmao (please don't kill me)

I def. agree that dudes (me sef) need to work on their game and all that but Naija babes de form die! I've heard and seen babes that formed n then used their people to hint after that they like someone. Why the need for such long tins?

And uh i'm a firm believer in the fact that if you are in the club, you came to be dry-humped...till the cloth tears sef lol. But that's just me.

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

happy new year!!!

F said...

LMAO at "winter runs"... Please don't rub it in! It's so bad that we are hating on snow now... Poor snow... The amounts of insults it has received, u would think it was a person...

About fronting... it's mostly just an excuse... You lack game and the babe didn't feel you. FULLSTOP. Noone was fronting... For the girls who see someone they like and purposely send them away "so as not to look cheap"... Meeeen, hope u fixed up in your new year's resolutions o!

lailai said...

i just luv your blogs, the way i see it sha is if the guy's approach is not working on one lady, he should try another that might like his lines, there are really some ladies out there who like being told that "their behinds are the bomb" at 1st sight oh

Kilishi Diaries said...

As I always say, 9ja guys don't know the difference between nyanga/fronting and heck-no-I-don't-want-to-give-you-my number! There's a good chance this chic who you think is playing hard to get just plain isn't interested. But in an effort to maintain that ego of theirs they resort to saying that she is fronting and doing nyanga instead of... I got rejected! 9ja guys listen up oh! Women will only play hard to get up until the point they know its becoming detrimental...as in times are rough...we know there is another chic right around the corner waiting to cook pots of egusi and edi-K to reel you in....so call a spade a spade...if she no give u digits its cuz she didn't want to & she probably isn't interested :-)

Anonymous said...

dee