Clutter

I dislike clutter. If your number has been sitting idle in my phone for the last 2 months i.e no sort of activity including texting and the like, chances are it will probably be deleted.
My IM lists in total has about 5-7 active people. I deleted the 1 million other inactive folk who I randomly chatted with one and off.
I am constantly downsizing stuff from my closet...

Yes, I dislike clutter.

And it gets extra awkward when such idle inviduals randomly text you out of the blue with 'What's up blahblahblah' and I'm thinking 'who is this?'. Back in the day I tried to be nice about it and cook up some excuse about 'I switched phones and your number didn't make it'.
These days I straight up ask 'who is this?' and I get responses like 'ah ah, is that how it is?'

Nothing personal sis/bro...I just do not like clutter.

I noticed that I had been deleted off about 2 individuals' Facebook friends lists and I wasn't even mad at that. If I was in their shoes and I was some inactive random person on their list, I would probably delete me too.

Sometimes I wonder if I should make space for a little clutter.
For instance, in the case of the deleted numbers. I figure that it's not a bad thing to hold on to people's numbers just in case of incasity, but then I figure that is what facebook is for right? right.
I mean, I'm more lenient with the FB thing. So if there was any in case of incasity event that came up, I could always contact you on Facebook and possibly ask for your # or something.

It is just a huge peeve to be scrolling through my phonebook looking for a number and I find a whole bunch of random ass digits that are making it even harder to find what I am looking for.
Or ya know, I don't understand why I should have a whole bunch of folk on my IM list that I don't even talk to like that.

And I don't think that it's a bad idea to de-clutter one's blog list too. I mean are you really going to be reading and commenting on someone's blog and they never/hardly ever check on you? Or is that petty?

Either way, de-cluttering rocks!

So, do you keep the stagnant folk around in case of incasity or are you a constant 'downsizer' like me?

Personal Taste?

Recently, I was chatting with my favorite BT while browsing facebook pictures and mid convo, I randomly inserted 'Maaan, X is all types of yummy yummy'.

We continued to chat...but it got me thinking about said X dude and other types of yummy yums that I've come across in my lifetime. I run into these extra hot dudes and wonder what kind of women they date 'cos somewhere in my mind, I am convinced that I am not these men's 'type' in terms of the physical.

Oya hold your horses. I know what you might be thinking...Insecure? Never that.
I'm actually pretty confident when it comes to the opposite sex. Like a typical LEO, I expect to step up in a piece and get noticed 'cos I gots good swag, I'm a cute chick etc etc
But does getting noticed= hot men considering me to be their type? Sure, they could peep me and think 'Oh, she's cute' or 'Yeah she got that swag' but not neccesarily consider me to be what they'd usually go for.

Yes, I'm convinced that most men have a physical 'type'. I shared these thoughts with the BT and she said something along the lines of 'men have a universal type of chick that they will see and start drooling over' and I knew that my thought process wasn't too crazy.

To further prove my point, I swear we go out to the clubs/parties and the women with the tight 'fits displaying some or all of their assets (preferably a cute ass or some nice perky tiddies) complete with long cascading curls and heels high enough to put the eiffel tower to shame are the ones who stand out.
Are these a universal type?

To wrap up that gist topic, BT said 'I consider myself to be a personal taste'.
You ask me, 'Personal taste ke?, what is that?'
And I respond:- Being a personal taste means that I might not be the universally accepted standard of what is hot/cute/sexy but I'm still a fly chick who holds her own.
Unfortunately it seems that when it comes to first impressions, personal taste aint gon' cut it 'cos despite what these dudes say, looks are a major factor when it comes to us wimmens and being considered a 'universal type' seems to be what will get you noticed from the get. Meanwoos as per personal taste, you just might have to have a convo or 2 with me before you realize that you like my ringtone. :-D
Ya get my drift sha...

Some random observations from my end:
1. I'm not anti the cascading curls that could put Beyonce to shame. I just wear my hair cut low 90% of the time 'cos it's easier to maintain and yeah I like the 'look'. The other 10% of the time when I decide to braid my hair/wear a wig I swear I get more play than I would have with the short nappy hair.
Is long hair a universal standard for cuteness and short hair a personal taste?

2. Out of one of my circles of friends, I've been tagged the most conservative dresser. My Pizzle cracks up every time I show her my latest 'vintage' purchase and she calls them maryamaka dresses. Conservative because I don't show cleavage (like I have cleavage to show sef...hisss), I don't do the tight minis, and I aint no born again christian...it's just not my style. Infact I'm more of the skinny jeans, a tee and some nice heels to the club or something of that casual chic nature. One day I decided to break out of the norm and gave them a mini shirt dress that showed my oh so lovely legs and hugged my figure 8 (Heheheheh). I swear I got mad looks of appreciation that day, even cats that see me around and never speak came up to say hi. I was convinced that the dress did it.
Universal standard vs personal taste?

All in all, it's pretty interesting. And I still ask: Who do the hot men date?
Guys, what type of chicks do you find yourselves gravitating to at social events?

Ladies, are you with me, or am I on my own with this one?

Let's talk.

PS:- Post done in bits and pieces of doing everything else. Forgive the 'all over the place' nature of it.

Blogservations.

First things first, so Temite went and made her blog private without informing me ehn?
All these private blogs sef, na wa o. If pesin no dey the cool kids club, how man for do nau?
Oh well, oh well.

I miss NaijadramaQueen.

There are like SO many blogs out there, it's ridiculous. I stay stumbling across tons and tons and sometimes e just dey tire me. Like man, if I added all those blogs to the blogroll, that one go turn into homework o.

I think one day I visited Bumight's blog and I saw that she had 103 comments. See, as a polite babe whose mama trained me well, I believe in making as much of an effort to visit the blogs of people who leave comments in my box, na in I come dey think...how I for enter 83 (assuming 20 of those comments was not her replying within her comment box, which na another work in itself) people's blogs. Dem go just tok say Mgbeke dey rude... Chai!

Am I the only one who has formed mental images of what I think certain bloggers look like? I doubt it.

In regards to replying within comment boxes, I dey try. I think I attempted it with one post and stopped halfway. I mean, do people even come back to check?
I know I do sha. :-D, but then again I do that with people who I know always reply within their comment boxes.

And on a final note, did I actually make 3 entries in the space of one week or so? oooh weeee. I am getting better at this.

PS:- My friend randomly reads blogs and she thinks that blogger is in general, a very cliquey place. In retrospect, I guess I kinda see where she is coming from but c'est la vie!

G'nite.

Sunday tori

Happy Sunday.
I have a love/hate feeling for Sundays. I love Sundays because they are usually peaceful, quiet, and they give me time to think/reflect. On the other hand, I hate Sundays because we all know the day that comes right after it---> Monday! Arghhhhh.
However, on this special occasion, I am definitely not hating Sunday 'cos I don't gotta work tomorrow. Yaaay!

Now let's get this on and popping...
To begin with, how was your falentines day? Did my boo'ed up bloggers have a fantabulous day with their SO's? (Significant others)
Did my single bloggers enjoy a day of self love and pampering sessions/hanging with loved ones who didn't have to be SO's?
Well, however way you spent it, I hope that it was a good day all in all.

I'm a single blogger who had absolutely no falentines blues. A bit surprising considering the fact that a bunch of my friends are currently boo'ed up. Then again, have I ever had falentines blues?
Aniwoos...my day was busy-ish. I ran errands, shopped, gymed and rewarded myself for my hard work at the gym with a big greasy meal from Popeyes. :-D
Later on, I came out of my semi-retirement from those parties and went to one around these parts.
In regards to my previous post about DMV men and blahblah, and upon my usual manner of people watching, I came to the conclusion that I now know why these men aint in no hurry to boo anyone up. Like kids in a candy store, options plenty!!!
Apart from the previously mentioned fact that it was like 50 beautiful women to 20 men, I observed that it had to be some dress code up in that piece. I swear every chick had like a short, tight mini and extra high heels. I had to turn to my friend and ask if we missed a memo or something. Or maybe I'm just out of touch since I kinda sorta retired from those parties...ya dig!
There was a group of friends that stood out to me. About 6 or 7 of them who all showed up in extra short, tight, red dresses. I swear I saw a panty or two as they cat walked past me and my peeps. Then they cat walked past 5 guys and like robots, all heads turned to follow the big booties. Hilarity indeed.
I can imagine that picking a falentine from that group of girls must have been a pretty hard task for all men involved.

Ms. Sula really really really reminds me of my God-sister. Same location, same interests (it seems), same age, same...I dunno. So by force, by force she is now my blogger God-sis. This one na by force adoption into my fam o so you no get option to decline am.

Whatever happened to Dat1Okirikagirl? I hope all is well with her o...

Self Audit (Temite, sue me)
I've been 3/4 successful at doing all the things I said I would try to do e.g Going to bed earlier, drinking more H2O, working out more, going to church more often and tithing as often as I can, Calling mi mama more often...etc etc.
I'm working on bumping up the 3/4 success rate to a 100%. Discipline is hard, but I'm learning.

I have been spring cleaning. Mentally and physically. Spring cleaning is always wonderful.

I have hopped on the bandwagon that I've been wanting to hop on. It will be a challenge but I can do it. I'm trying to push myself here, yo.

And in general, I'm good and I'm happy.

And on that note, I'm off to eat my ice cream cone and watch a Naija movie. I kinda fell off on that OnlineNigeria tip but I see this new one with my main girl Rita Dominic and y'all gotta know that I love me some Rita D.

Enjoy the coming week.

The scarcity of males in the DMV.

A friend of mine who recently moved to these parts pulled me aside at an event one day and said ‘What is up with the 80 women to 20 men ratio at you DMV folks events?’

To which I replied… ‘My sister, join the club!’

Join the club indeed. You see, she was right. That is the story in this DC/MD/VA area and its social scene. 1 million beautiful women, and not enough men to go around.I remember when I was young and fresh to the bubbling scene, I would go for parties with the anticipation of hopefully snagging a number or two. Can you blame me? I was coming from Naija where you could meet a guy ANYWHERE. Be it standing by the roadside buying oranges, or while on the back of an Okada with your cascading weave flying in the wind and a man would spy you from his car and tell his driver… ‘Follow that bike’. Yezzzur, you met men any and everywhere and parties/clubs were not the exception.So I came out to these parts and after doing my bubbling rounds, I came to the blunt realization that thangs were not the same here.

Meanwoos, I really do think that it might a DMV issue ‘cos in my travels around the US of A, I have observed that the ratio of male to females at social gatherings appears to be more balanced and the males seem to be more forthcoming.

But back to my DMV tori…
There are truly a bunch of factors working against a single woman in the DMV who hopes to snag one of these men.

1. Like I mentioned before, the female to male ratio is far from balanced. The men appear to have way too many options and do not seem to be ready to settle down. If you left your house thinking that your mini dress and weave was on point and you were going to be that chick at the social event, you step up in there and see about 30 other women with bangin’ minis and weaves. Womp womp!

2. Ok, a wise male once made a good point. He said ‘When there are so many other beautiful women in the club/party, what makes you think that YOU are going to make a special connection with any of these men’. Good point, point taken. So the single woman says lets me switch it up and go to more weddings. Sorry o! Nothing for you! The men at the weddings are either boo’ed up with their boos clutching them really tight knowing that there are many thirsty girls like you on the prowl OR the men are like the men that you saw at the parties. There are many beautiful women like you, you aint gonna stand out unless you make a one on one connection with them and in all honesty, how do you make a one on one connection with a random guy?

3. So the wedding and club/party thing aint working so you decided to try church. Still, nothing for you! It just aint gon’ work.

4. Now the most common factor linking all 3 points that I just listed above is: The DMV Naija community like most Naija communities gets small after much bubbling. The men that you see at the club/parties on Friday night are the same men who show up to the weddings on Saturday and then on Sunday, you see them in church praying for forgiveness for their sinful ways. It is the same darn men and no fresh new faces. Now, I’m not mad that it’s the same darn men but running into the same darn men at all events doesn’t really help matters now, does it?

So, my solution(s) to this issue is:
1. Maybe single ladies in the DMV need to go bubble in other states which could lead to them meeting dudes in other states, but dang it’s a recession and man pikin no wan spend an arm and a leg to see a bobo when they can be just a drive away.

2. Maybe single ladies in the DMV should branch out to other nations/expand their options.

3. Maybe single ladies in the DMV need to expand their social life beyond club/parties/weddings/church to other things like house parties (which are more intimate), artsy things, fundraising dinners etc etc. Although, I must point out that it was at a fundraising dinner that my newbie friend made that observation so ummm yeah!

4. Or maybe DMV dudes just need to step their game up and not let these burriful ladies pass them by. Life isn’t all about a big booty and a cute smile and that appears to be what is shacking these bobos so they no wan settle down with 1 female. I mean, I stay hearing dudes talking ‘bout they are looking for the right female blahblahblah. Ummm she might be right there in front of you, honey.

Or is this just not a DMV issue? Speak on it!

Mgbeke's Creed

1. I believe in faking it if you don’t have it. Be it, wearing foundation to get the coveted flawless skin, wearing spanx to make folk think that your hips aren’t as wide, sucking in your stomach and fooling folk into thinking that you can put abs that can put Christina Milan to shame. Fake it, no one will know better anyway. :-D

2. I believe that every woman needs:-

• A good friend or 2, 3, 4… (Forget the ‘I don’t do female friends’ thing that women always say)
• A little black dress
• Some emergency money stashed away somewhere
• An ‘it’ pair of shoes, an ‘it’ pair of jeans and an 'it' bag in no particular order.
• Peace with oneself and others, love and happiness.

3. I believe that if you’re hungry, you should eat!

4. I believe in guilt-free pampering of one’s self at any given opportunity.

5. I believe in letting go, and letting God.

6. I believe that constant laughter is one beauty secret that the magazines don’t tell you about.

7. I believe that it’s ok to be the girl/guy next door. We were not all born to have marvelous talents or to change the world and that is perfectly okay. The world needs balance anyway.

8. I believe that we as women need to quit making excuses for the opposite sex and realize that we deserve nothing less than what we require.

9. I believe in 'just doing it'. Life is short, do it now and odds are you won't regret that you did, as opposed to the 'what-ifs' that might pop up later.

10. I believe that we were not all born on the same day, so what's the use in comparing yourself to other people. Your own time is coming, and its going to be really good when it comes.

:-)

Hey bloggers, happy humpday. (PS:- I just found out what humpday meant very recently)...aniwoos it snowed and there was freezing rain so things is ridiculous out there. I currently feel like crap due to being down with the sniffles so any one willing to fedex me some hot and spicy peppersoup will be loved forever and ever. :-D

Enjoy the rest of the week.

A post about everything and nothing.

Happy new year bloggers. Better late than never. I am thankful that this year has brought all my bloggers back safe, sound, alive and ready for better better this year o.
We thank God indeed.

NYE was spent in church. Yes, blink again...you heard me right. Church! A far cry from this ehn? A God fearing man. Well, a few weeks after that, my friends dragged me to a vigil in this area and per their observations, I have made it a point to frequent church more often. :-)...I even became an official member of the church after like 4 years of going there off and on, yay for me.
I still do have some conflicts about religion because I tend to see things in a very black or white way, no grey areas for this chick right here but hey! baby steps right?

I entered the new year with a serious downsize of my closet and a complete overhaul of my lingerie collection. I also entered the new year with a resolution (and I normally stay away from making these)..:- Shop less. I had to lay the smack down after I randomly decided to look at my spending habits of the '08 to check where my money went to and errrm...the amount spent on clothing and thangs was quite a shameful amount, I tell ya... Seriously!
It is Jan 13th and I haven't bought jack! Yeah yeah, it's just the 13th but baby steps abi? :-D

This new year, I have also been accused of acting like a single woman in her 20's who is trying to get married soon. Hahahaha...
This came about based off 3 things.

• Me and my paddy were talking marriage, and she said 'what if I never get married'...to which I responded 'If marriage is something that you see in your future, pray that God not only sends you a hubby, but pray that he sends you a correct hubby'. To which she responded...'Ahhh, who gave you a church pass. Look at you acting like a single woman trying to get married and turns to God'. LOL
• This same paddy observed that I was buying my first ever Ankara/Woodin. (Does that count as a clothing purchase? Leave me jare, it was some sweet designs at 6 yards for $20. Shoutout to Ankara Boutique..), and she said 'ehnn you want to sew traditional. Hahahahaha, you dey find husband'
  * I only own one traditional outfit which I have worn only once.
  
• Last but I bet this won't be the last time, I asked this same paddy for her dodo and gizzard recipe, and she said that I am trying to win my way into a man's heart through his stomach.

LOL. I found all 3 'accusations' to be pretty funny. Like dang, once you hit a certain age and you are just doing something random, it could be percieved as you trying to practice your wifey material skills. Hehehehehe...no be small thing. I mean, I am truly not concerned about my relationship status at this point, not concerned at all. Despite the fact that my dear momma spent the holiday season with me and chose to drop hints every second she got.
'I will wear this necklace at your traditional wedding'
'I can't wait to bounce my grandbabies on my lap'
'You and Pizzle should go with Aunty C next time she wants to introduce you guys to the elig. bachelors that she spoke about'
'I hope for better better this year o'

...My mother will not kill me. I didn't even blink...besides, I have a big sis who she can go and harrass. :-D

My 'diet' has started o. I'm potentially going to be at a beach in March and I have to make sure that my body is bikini ready.

I believe that if something is not meant for you, it will not be for you. Can I get an Amen??

I have a love/hate relationship with long hair. I hate hair in my face, I hate hair around my face. Growing up, my friend B always said that if her hair was as rich and as full as mine she would constantly stay styling it. I kept mine in a ponytail most days...
Even now, when I get braids...half of the time it's kept up in a ponytail. I cut my hair and went natural so that I wouldn't have to bother with retouching and styling, the whole 9 yards. Some people see me and they are like 'I love your hair, it's so different, I like the fact that you don't subscribe to the weave and perm mentality' and I'm like no honey, this wasn't done for any afrocentric reason...I just couldn't be bothered.
After my last cut session, I vowed to let my hair grow back into a fro and it is growing but I can't lie, everytime I walk past a hair cuttery I am tempted to just go and chop, chop, chop. Maybe I should braid it again to resist the urge.

Apart from good genes, what is the secret to really good skin?

You know you should be updating your resume when at 12 p.m on Tuesday, you're already dreaming of friday. Can I get another Amen?

Enjoy the rest of your week. I need to get on my blog rounds.