I am not a Man-Hater

You know, when people started accusing me of being a male hater/male basher, I used to brush it off and say 'yeah right, me ke?'. But lately, I’ve been getting that a lot… ‘I read some of your FB comments on certain topics, you are such a man hater’, ‘Why do you bash men so much?’, ‘You come off as such a feminist nazi’…Man hater. Male Basher. Feminist nka nka…na wa o!Last weekend, there was the typical men are from mars/women are from venus discussion and my friend actually came to grab me, talkin’ about… ‘Are you guys looking for a man hater to state her opinion? Here she is...’ or something like that. I mean like, shuooooo. LOL, I know not what they speak of ‘cos I am INNOCENT.
Hehehehehe…I mean, a girl can’t even be out spoken about things and fly under the radar no more. Truth is…and I continue to issue this disclaimer:- I am NOT a man hater. The sight of men does not make my blood boil, I haven’t gone upside someone’s son’s head with a frying pan yet neither have I poured hot water on some poor man’s genitals so what are they talking about? I really and truly do not consider myself to be a man hater.

I mean…someone once asked me if a man had ever done me dirty in my lifetime and I replied and said ‘sorry to disappoint but I have no sob stories to share…’. Does a man have to do me dirty for me to call a man out when he’s being a pure and darn fool? *rolls eyes*
Granted, I admit that sometimes my approach can be a tad bit aggressive but that’s what you get when you are TRIFLING man parading around the face of this earth. I have no patience for y’all and I will continue to call you guys out on your foolishness. Just because I refuse to sit back and turn a blind eye to the madness don’t make me a man hater na. *Re-adjusts halo*
I remember when Steve McNair got kilt by his jumpoff and I texted one of my male friends expressing how I felt absolutely no ounce of sorrow for the man, and how I hoped that all married men would learn from such an unfortunate incident and hopefully keep their roving eyes and penises to themselves, and I tell you… ol’ boy caught a case o. Accused me of being a man hater, couldn’t believe how insensitive I was blahblahblahblah. Pssh…men, don’t get mad when I call y’all out and state the obvious. I’m not going to retire from my outspoken ‘male bashing’ ways sha o so everyone who thinks I’m a man hater should keep on thinking. :-D
Like one of my desk calendar quotes says… ‘When a man gives his opinion, he’s a man. When a woman gives her opinion, she’s a bitch’. It is what it is...

And yes, it goes beyond trifling men…
There have been WAY too many of those men are from Mars/Women are from Venus types of discussions and I think I’ve just about heard all it is that men have to say and as always, I issue my counter argument/opinion. The various ‘dating do’s and don’ts’ and the knowledge that these species really think that they are dropping on a daily basis:

'Don’t buy a luxury car or a house, it will intimidate men'
'If you’ve been with more than 10 men, you’re a ho and no man will wanna marry you'
‘Men don’t like a woman who parties too much, you won’t be considered as wifey material’
'Go and learn how to cook. Men like a woman who can cook'

etc etc. P.S:- If I hear that ‘wifey material’ word one more time, I will scream.

Uh uh, it’s a man’s world…or so they say but I’m one woman who will continue to state her opinion in this man’s world. And let me state this opinion real quick...
PSA to my men: The existence and sole purpose of women on earth is not to be married off to you, get knocked up with your 5 children and cook all your meals. We too have lives to live, places to go and things to do. We will not put our lives on hold and turn into boring stagnant stepford mickfricks all in the name of being considered 'wifey material'...imma need y'all to get with the program and save the darn rules and regulations for your sister or something.
The absolutely heelarious thing is that these culprits end up marrying women who are the complete opposite of who they swore made up the ideal wifey...the man who swore on the head of his bear bear that he would not wife a 'double digit ho' will marry a 100 count prostitute and in the end, who will the joke be on?

Seriously, it really does get my goat how these dudes think that we ladies are sitting around waiting desperately to be scooped up. A woman can’t even have standards no more without y’all coming at us with the ‘You are 30, your mates are married…be there feeling picky’. Excuse you? Who sent out the memo that 30 was the cut off age? And who told your 5’6, broke, living with your momma at age 30 azz that any 30 year old fabulous woman would EVER give you the time of the day in this world or the next even if you were the last man on planet Earth? There is more to us than our vajayjays, our cooking skills, our so called submissive attitude and everything that you consider to be qualities desired in the so called wifey material. It is absofrigginlutely ridiculous!

How do I hear a man spew a senseless comment like ‘Men will cheat, it’s a man’s world…you women need us anyway’ and sit back and let the foolishness slide? When I tell the man that don’t nobody need his foolish self for shishi and I can do bad all by myself, he calls me a man hater. Hellooo, how do I even get with a fool like that? Abeg o...make all man know their levels.


Ok Ok, I just realized that I’m totally NOT doing a great job trying to convince anyone that I’m really not a man hater am I? LMAO. I mean what I’m really trying to say is…Argh! I give up…lol. But…like I said, I, the Original Mgbeke do not hate men. In fact, every man on earth should appreciate my outspoken ways sef. Trust that I will never fail to keep you my darlings in check. :-D

*Blows kisses to any man who happens to read this*. LMAO.