The lying Devil + Nigerians trying to kill me again.

O blogsville residents, repeat after me...'The devil is a liar'.
Devil I senior you. Ooooo, devil I senior you. Spiritually, mentally, financially, academically, socially and physically.

Hia, make una come and see me see trobu ooo. Devil wan try me but hin no sabi say I senior am! Mai pipu na im I get one vacation wey I wan waka go next week and I applied for my passport since May 21st o. I suppose organize this waka this coming Sunday but come Tuesday, I still never see my passport.
I come dey sweat, dey perspire. I mean, I haven't been working on getting my body bikini ready for nada, have I? Shuooo...see mess up o!

I called the Passport office and dem tok say dem mail the passport out to me since May 29th, I said haba! I never receive am oo...see me see wahala. The passport rep tok say dem go mail the passport out on Wednesday (yesterday), and I should get it by today.

But yesterday, my heart still dey do jigijigipampam. I decided to call back to see if they had sent it out again and I encountered another passport rep who started to yarn long story about setting an appointment to enter DC and have them re-issue another one. Ol' girl practically felt my claws come out over the phone as I gave her some serious attitude ehn! Is it only DC? I had to friggin' pay $200 to expedite that ish so I'll be damned if they made me do an unplanned waka into DC. The heck?

I just vex, tell the babe say make she give me tracking number so I can log onto the USPS website and peep the situation for myself. Put the tracking number into the website and saw that the passport was chilling in the post office right next to my house. In fact this passport had been chilling there since May 29...*hisses and rolls eyes*
Called the post office, the passport was there and I was out of work by 4:30 in an effort to make it to the P.O before 5pm aka closing time. Long story short, my brand new passport is right here with moi and I sayyy the devil is a liar!

So I come senior the devil for this one and I don tok say no weapon formed against me shall prosper. Amen?? Your girl is off to Costa Rica for 5 days, come next week with my passport in hand. Wooohooooo! So I'm hella looking forward to that, and I know that it will be a fun trip. :-)

On to other news, Nigerians will NOT kill me. I know you guys must have already seen the emails/ FB notes about the new Naija abbreviations. I don did a couple of posts in the pasts and some people commented with 'LWKM', it took me a while to figure out that LWKM= Laughter will not kill me. Hahahahahahahha....
As in ehn, the abbreviations no get part 2! I was seeing ish like:

MIDG - make i dey go
WGYL - we go yarn later
IGA - I gbadun am
ICS - I can't shout
DJM - Don't jealous me
WBDM - Who born d maga
UDC - U de craze
WDH - wetin dey happen
NDH - nutin dey happen
FMJ - free me jo
BBP - bad bele people
HUD - how u dey
WKP - waka pass
KKL - Kokolette
MML - mamalette
GFF- Gbono fe le fe le (e.g., she GFF)
NTT - Na true talk
IKU - It koncain u?
NDM - no dull me
LGT - let's goo there
IFSA - I for slap am
IGDO - I go die o
YB - Yess boss
NLT - No long thing
2GB - 2 gbaski (e.g., the song 2GB!)
CWJ - carry waka jorh
WBYO - wetin be your own
MKG - maka gini?
WSDP - who send dem papa
INS - i no sendINFS - i no fit shout
WWY - who wan yarn
NBST - no be small thing
NWO - na wah oooooo
NMA - no mind am
MIHW - make i hear word
NBL - no be lie
NB? - na beans?
wd - wetin dey
UNGKM - u no go kill me

Abeg o, mai kontri pipu...which kain abbreviations be these ones na? LMAO...ooops LWKMD. Hia! In fact this one no be abbreviation again, na just pure laziness. Hahahahahah. I just weak for the situation. Can you imagine what text messages will start to look like? Imagine a text conversation where NiceAnon said that she heard that I am trying to holla at Scribbles.

Mgbeke: NB? NWO...INFS (Na beans? Na wa ooo...I no fit shout!)
Nicey: NBL? UNGKM shaaa. (No be lie? You no go kill me sha)
Mgbeke: ICS. FMJ, MBDM... (I can't shout. Free me jor...Who born the maga?)
Nicey: LWKM. Anyways WGYL (Laughter will not kill me, Anyways we go yarn later)

Like shuoooooo. LOL...oops LWKM. Anyways my pipu, na the tori of the day be that. Make una continue to maintain for ya end o. Have a bubbling and shuffling weekend and if anyone wan vex you this weekend, just ask if dem sabi di day when George Bush start to climb on top okada. I mean, levels get levels. Who born the maga? In fact, I no fit shout!

Peace & Love. :-D